I am at peace however he is not....

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Disneyhenry

DisneyRosie
Joined
Jul 24, 2010
DH and I met 13 years ago, his father was a strict minister and I was raised in a religious cult. We both wanted more kids and we both wanted to find a religion we both loved, we agreed to find a church together. Well he backed out of that agreement (along with several others but that's besides the point right now).

I found my family that my mother had stole me from, my auntie taught me how to be spiritual, I now have a wonderful relationship with our creator, I do not believe in the Bible. I go to bed at night and sleep in peace knowing my heart is in a good place.
At the beginning of 2017 my DHs mother passed away, now all of a sudden DH believes Armageddon is coming! We are all gonna die! I Think he is crazy! Our creator would never harm Mother Earth.
Arg now he wants to go to Church! Why on earth would I go when I don't even believe in the Bible?
I know being married is about sacrifices, give n takes, compromising. But how could I pretend to be something I am not?
I feel he had a chance and if we would have gone to church when we both agreed to then maybe I would feel differently then I do now......
We have an 8 year old we both teach him how we feel, I tell our son to go with what his heart says, believe what he feels is real.
Before DH met me he always got his way on everything, I don't give him his way on everything, I don't let him be selfish even though he can be at times. He just won't stop on this whole "religious" thing.

I am just looking for others input on this, should I go to church n just keep my mouth shut this is driving a bigger wedge between us
 
Take my advice with a grain of salt. I absolutely do not care for organized religion. However, I think if you are going to "go to church" your heart must be in it. I do not believe in being hypocritical in how you live your life. If you don't believe in the bible, don't believe in the "condemnation-style" of some religions, then you should not participate. But you probably need to have some "non religious" marital counseling. Religion, money, etc. are some of the biggest wedges in a marriage. Your marriage may not possible survive such opposing viewpoints. Both of you need to learn how to deal with that.
 
DH and I met 13 years ago, his father was a strict minister and I was raised in a religious cult. We both wanted more kids and we both wanted to find a religion we both loved, we agreed to find a church together. Well he backed out of that agreement (along with several others but that's besides the point right now).

I found my family that my mother had stole me from, my auntie taught me how to be spiritual, I now have a wonderful relationship with our creator, I do not believe in the Bible. I go to bed at night and sleep in peace knowing my heart is in a good place.
At the beginning of 2017 my DHs mother passed away, now all of a sudden DH believes Armageddon is coming! We are all gonna die! I Think he is crazy! Our creator would never harm Mother Earth.
Arg now he wants to go to Church! Why on earth would I go when I don't even believe in the Bible?
I know being married is about sacrifices, give n takes, compromising. But how could I pretend to be something I am not?
I feel he had a chance and if we would have gone to church when we both agreed to then maybe I would feel differently then I do now......
We have an 8 year old we both teach him how we feel, I tell our son to go with what his heart says, believe what he feels is real.
Before DH met me he always got his way on everything, I don't give him his way on everything, I don't let him be selfish even though he can be at times. He just won't stop on this whole "religious" thing.

I am just looking for others input on this, should I go to church n just keep my mouth shut this is driving a bigger wedge between us

You say you think he is crazy because he believes Armageddon is coming. If he believes the Bible then he is believing in what it teaches. That being said, the Bible does not teach that we are all going to die in The Tribulation period. In all fairness he may think you are crazy. Your situation is definitely a conundrum to be in. You are disappointed that he did not embrace a faith when you were ready. Unfortunately, it doesn't work that way. Everyone has a different journey and their own time line that may be different from yours. Obviously he is very passionate about it at this point in his life. I think only you can decide whether to attend church with him but going to church with him doesn't mean that you are a believer. There is no pretending, in his religion his God knows whether you believe in the Bible or not and honestly that is your business not anyone else's in the church. I would not give that much credence to what other people attending think. I grew up Catholic and went to a Baptist church with my DH and our children on Sundays in addition to going to mass as well. I did it because I felt it was important for our kids to be exposed to both and decide when they were old enough. That act did not make me a Baptist just because I went there. I eventually chose later in life to solely attend a Baptist church when I felt I wanted to be there only. I wish you well with your decision. Please update and let us know what you decide!
 
You say you think he is crazy because he believes Armageddon is coming. If he believes the Bible then he is believing in what it teaches. That being said, the Bible does not teach that we are all going to die in The Tribulation period. In all fairness he may think you are crazy. Your situation is definitely a conundrum to be in. You are disappointed that he did not embrace a faith when you were ready. Unfortunately, it doesn't work that way. Everyone has a different journey and their own time line t

The only thing I'm disappointed in is the fact that he lied or didn't follow through with his promise, after all it was his idea and sounded good to me. The statement you said about him thinking I was crazy, what if I stated "everyone believing in the Bible is crazy?" Including him?
We are a couple who don't compromise so this wedge between us isn't good and will only lead to us going down different roads I am sure. I have felt this way for over 8 years now, during those 8 years he really didn't care for religion or the Bible.
I know my spirituality will never change, like I said I go to bed in peace every night, I feel bad for those who go to bed in fear of. Armageddon or the Great Tribulation
Thank you, your statement has opened my eyes on the subject
 


The only thing I'm disappointed in is the fact that he lied or didn't follow through with his promise, after all it was his idea and sounded good to me. The statement you said about him thinking I was crazy, what if I stated "everyone believing in the Bible is crazy?" Including him?
We are a couple who don't compromise so this wedge between us isn't good and will only lead to us going down different roads I am sure. I have felt this way for over 8 years now, during those 8 years he really didn't care for religion or the Bible.
I know my spirituality will never change, like I said I go to bed in peace every night, I feel bad for those who go to bed in fear of. Armageddon or the Great Tribulation
Thank you, your statement has opened my eyes on the subject

I'm not sure what you mean about the crazy part; in your own words you said , " I think he is crazy." I am pointing out that he may have the same feelings about you. It can go both ways.

I understand you are disappointed with him because he did not follow through on his commitment years ago. People are not perfect and will always let you down. Maybe one thing we can agree on is that God, yours and mine forgives. Holding on to no forgiveness can certainly hurt any relationship. That may be causing the wedge as well.

Going to church with him doesn't mean you will change but maybe it could be used as a vehicle to support him. As far as Tribulation is concerned Christians don't go to bed afraid at night because they are assured by God that they won't be a part of it. So don't feel bad for us!:D

I do truly wish you the best and hope you all can come to some resolve. I believe faith/ religion and your agreement on it is the cornerstone of martial relationships.
 
Are you guys in marriage counseling? Because it honestly sounds like you need it. You admit that neither of you compromises on anything, and your posts come across as “I am right and no matter what my husband does it is wrong unless it agrees with why I believe.” You can go to church with him sometimes just to learn about what he believes. That doesn’t mean you have to believe it too.
 


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