It's time for me....

[PRINCESS VIJA]

I wandered over to WISH after a long absence. I have been trying almost every day to get started and by 8:00 am I have fallen down. I am tired of being sick and tired. My body is exhausted. and carrying around an extra #150 pounds will do that to a person. There are so many wonderful things to experience in this life and I am tired of being ashamed. I am tired of not having clothes to fit. I am tired of eating until I fell sick. I am tired of beating myself up. Tired of thinking about losing weight every minute of every waking hour of every day. It even invades my dreams. I had one this past week about losing weight. I tell you I am THINKING about it EVERY MINUTE!!!! It is time to stop thinking about it and time to do something about it.

My kids love me, my husband loves me... it is time for me to work on me and love myself. I am student teaching right now, and soon to look for a job. I want to go in with confidence and feel good about myself. I look at my kids and when my DD says she will always love me I am thinking in my head... "but will I be here for you? Will I die of a heart attack before you are a teenager?" What an incredibly frightening thing. NO MORE!!!!! I want to live!

I already brushed my teeth and am going to use that as a signal that eating is done for the day. Only water after that. No more diet soda way into the night. I have decided NOW, not tomorrow, but NOW I am doing this!

My plan..

Follow the WW plan (with my milk modification)
brush teeth at night for a strategy
exercise 4x a week in the morning

 

[kmp1191]

Welcome!!
Wow....you are a definate take charge person!! I loved your post. I feel that way too...get mad and get'erdone attitude! You will do great! Stick with it and take it day by day, you are ging to do great here!

 

[kimwim8]

Welcome back to WISH!

We're here for ya! Keep on journaling!

 

[PRINCESS VIJA]

First full day. I did OK today. This morning I am proud that I didn't eat any chips on the way in to work. I decided that this was it and no more and I am proud that I kept it up! I just finished eating dinner. I will finish drinking the soda that I have and then I am going to go brush my teath and journal my points. Thanks for the positive comments!

A note to DH.... He will see this in a few months.... I mentioned that my feet were SOOOOO tired after work today. I am an OR nurse and on my feet at work for 12 hours. anyway he is so supportive and said that I need to loose weight. (I suppose it doesn't sound nice, but he said it in a suppportive, comforting way because he doesn't want to see me in pain.) Anyhow I was so excited in my head because I knew I had already made the commitment to myself and I can't wait to surprise him with a steady weight loss!!!!!