Nephew wants to enlist...He signed. Update pg 2

[bengalbelle]

Hi,

My nephew who will be 21 in November is determined to join the Marines. He has talked to a Marine recruiter (alone) and has decided that's the branch of service for him. Family members are trying to get him to speak with other recruiters too (with his dad or grandfather along) so he doesn't make a hasty and uninformed decision.

Can anyone advise us on questions he should be asking these recruiters? Also, I'd love to hear comments on other branches of service. DH was AF but we're trying not to push it too much with our nephew because he thinks everyone is trying to tell him what to do.

No one is against him joining the military, we just want him to be as informed as possible before making his final decision. I really don't know what else to ask. He's still somewhat immature and I'm afraid he's not looking at the big picture...he's kind of starry eyed about the Marine Corp. We don't know if he's the type to be career military, so we're trying to help him understand that he needs to think about job training and career opportunites also.

Thanks

 

[lovemygoofy]

My first question is for your nephew. Does he understand that he can be sent to war and die or be permantely maimed? I'm not saying that this is a guarntee but so many don't understand until they are already there.

How long are marine enlistments? It used to be in the army that it was 6 years whether all active or some inactive but now I think you can serve 3-4 and be done.

Is he in pysically good shape? Does he have an idea what he would like to do in the military and not necessarily the marines and not what the recruiter told him?

My only real advice is to get everything, every request by your nephew and every promise by the recruiter, no matter the branch, in writing. Read over the contract several times over before it is signed even if takes 3 hours of sitting there while 5 of you read over it and over it again. Make sure all college money options are in it as well as anything else mentioned for future career stuff.

I don't know what to tell you about the army except they are giving some really good bonuses for anyone willing to enlist and ship out in under 30 days. If you have any questions I can answer, please feel free to contact me.

 

[jmskinner]

Hi!

We are AF ourselves. Remind him that even if he serves his time, it is possible that they could pull him back into active duty. I have always recommended Air Force because it seems like they normally aren't away from the families as much. I did give a fresh Lt. a shock yesterday. He asked how long my DH was in Iraq and I told him one year. I thought he was going to fall over. I really don't think he realized he could be sent away to Iraq for that long if he is AF. I know certain jobs in the Air Force do require the members to be away for long times. As you well know.

Something I will never forget is my DH's cousin waking his mother up at 2:00am after watching "Saving Private Ryan". He asked her if that is what war is really like, she told him it was a very realistic movie. He was to sign up with the Army the next day, he didn't do it.

I apologize for not being more help, but DH gets home Sunday so I may be able to get some good info from him next week if you still need some help. Our base has all branches so he does work with them all.

I hope he takes his time and makes the right decision.

 

[lyeag]

For the recruiter:
Does he have any college hours? If he does it can make a difference in rank once you come out of boot camp. Well, at least it did when I was in the Navy. Once I got out of boot camp my rank went up to an E-3. Also, ask about what job he will get and will he get a school guaranteed in his contract. I made sure I knew what school I was going to because it was in my contract. Ask about any enlisted bonuses that may be offered.
Just remember, once you leave the recruiter's office and go to the MEPS to be in processed LOOK AT YOUR CONTRACT CAREFULLY. Make sure what you were promised is there in writing.


Some other things to think about. Being in the military means you really have little control over some big things in your life. Is he ready for that? Is he prepared to deploy to Iraq as soon as he finishes basic training? It will most likely happen. Good Luck to your nephew!

 

[drivencrazy]

Hello, My cousin (20) just went into the Air Force, he left today! He was also thinking of going into the Marine's... my Aunt had him talk to my uncle who was in the Air Force for over 25 years and is doing on the outside, what he did in the Air Force... My cousin also talked with my hubby which is in the Air Force. What changed his mind? I think that it was the fact that the Air Force is more family friendly and he is one day wanting a family. His mom said that she doesn't think that she will have to worry about him as much being in the AF as in the Marines......... I think we have to worry about all our service men and women, no matter what branch.

My Husband has a cousin that was a Marine, he didn't enjoy being a Marine as much as he had thought he would and got out after his 6 years. His younger brother is in the Army now because big brother told him to skip the Marines and do something else... he went to the Army.

We have a friend that my hubby went to all the branches with and even took him out to the AF base... he decided to go into the Navy, he just finished basic training about 2 months ago. It was what fit him in what he wanted to do, he is going to try for Navy Seal... will he get it? We don't know yet, but that is his goal... he knows that it may not work out and knows what he will be doing if not. He is happy with that plan.

Do you know what kind of job he is wanting to do? I would really suggest that he talks to all the branches and see what is going to fit his needs better. I don't think it is ever an easy dissision.

Keep us updated on what he decides to do!

 

[bengalbelle]

I'll answer the questions as best I can.

He says he does understand that he will most likely be sent to war. I think he's like most young guys, though, and thinks "it won't happen to him."

He is very physically fit. I don't doubt that physically he can make it through boot camp. Mentally, I have some concerns.

He hadn't really thought about his long term goals until my MIL talked with him more a few days ago. She suggested AF to try to be a jet engine mechanic since he's mechanically inclined and seems to enjoy it. He told her he wanted to be a bomb detonator. He's suggesting things that are way out there and very dangerous and that's what has everyone so concerned...that he's not thinking this through.

If he knows how long he will be committed, he hasn't shared that with anyone else.

He has talked with the recruiter several times already. His father was supposed to go with him today but the recruiter changed the time twice and the father couldn't go. The recruiter said he'd take them out to dinner, but my nephew went back to see him again today. We haven't heard from him yet. Hopefully he hasn't signed anything yet.

What we know he's talked with the recruiter about is potential jobs. He said they talked about helicoptor mechanic and possibly being a gunner. He told the recruiter he wanted to do recon. and the recruiter encouraged that. MIL made my nephew asked about success rates (for recon.) and he wouldn't share a number or percentage, but said it was an extremely high rate of failure.

He does have some college credits.

Thank you all for the advice so far. I'm passing everything along.

 

[lyeag]

Just remember, whatever he signs with the recruiter is not a lock on him going in. He will have to sign again and take the oath just before he ships out. He can back out no matter what he does in the recruiter's office. It is the MEPS that makes it binding.

 

[ntsammy5]

He told her he wanted to be a bomb detonator.

WHAT???????

If that's what he told her, then he obviously doesn't understand what he said nor does he understand what his options are! I retired 4 years ago after 37 years in the Army, was airborne qualified (122 jumps) and to this day, I am proud to be a Ranger! I was in Vietnam, Gulf 1, WTC and was activated for Iraq! I served in mostly infantry and armor units, both active and NG and I'm not sure what all the answers are ---- I don't even know all the questions!

He needs to take someone with him to help him make informed decisions. I would never try to dissuade someone from serving in the Marines or in combat arms of the other services. He should just know what he's getting into, and enter into his enlistment with his eyes wide open. Good luck. Please post the final resolution

 

[bengalbelle]

Just remember, whatever he signs with the recruiter is not a lock on him going in. He will have to sign again and take the oath just before he ships out. He can back out no matter what he does in the recruiter's office. It is the MEPS that makes it binding.

Thank you. THanks also for mentioning the college credits. I don't think they had talked about that in their meetings.

WHAT???????

If that's what he told her, then he obviously doesn't understand what he said nor does he understand what his options are! I retired 4 years ago after 37 years in the Army, was airborne qualified (122 jumps) and to this day, I am proud to be a Ranger! I was in Vietnam, Gulf 1, WTC and was activated for Iraq! I served in mostly infantry and armor units, both active and NG and I'm not sure what all the answers are ---- I don't even know all the questions!

He needs to take someone with him to help him make informed decisions. I would never try to dissuade someone from serving in the Marines or in combat arms of the other services. He should just know what he's getting into, and enter into his enlistment with his eyes wide open. Good luck. Please post the final resolution

No one is trying to dissuade him from anything. We're urging him to do exactly what you've posted above:
1. meet with recruiters of all branches of services to (hopefully) find the best fit for him and
2. take his father or grandfather with him

Thankfully he hasn't mentioned bomb detonating again. His last conversation was headed more toward a mechanical job. I do think his mind is set on the Marines, though. He's supposed to go take his physical today.

So I'm clear, we're not anti-Marines or anti-military at all. Most of us believe the military is a good move for him, we just want him to take his time and evaluate all of his options before signing anything.

 

[ntsammy5]

Good luck. My reaction to the bomb detonator was probably overstated. I believe the correct term is EOD (explosive ordinance demolition) or the Navy equivalent. These are highly skilled, highly trained professionals who deal with all kinds of explosives including disposal of IEDs. Unless the military is using new terminology, a bomb detonator is just some poor schmuck who is in the wrong place at the wrong time.

 

[bengalbelle]

Good luck. My reaction to the bomb detonator was probably overstated. I believe the correct term is EOD (explosive ordinance demolition) or the Navy equivalent. These are highly skilled, highly trained professionals who deal with all kinds of explosives including disposal of IEDs. Unless the military is using new terminology, a bomb detonator is just some poor schmuck who is in the wrong place at the wrong time.

I don't know who exactly used the terminoloy, that's what was said to me. I knew he meant an explosives person, and the chances of him getting to that level are slim. It was more to show where his head is now and how extreme his choices/desires are. He's a great kid, he just doesn't always make the best decisions (as I'm sure many 20 year olds don't). I think the recruiter has gotten in his head a little bit and I think my nephew has something to prove...Not always the best combination.

 

[kctwinmommy]

Well, I wish him luck with whatever he decides. I can't give much help, I was only in the Air National Guard, so mine was a little different. I went in with a guaranteed job, and came back home to IL to do it. I know that at that time, there wasn't as much of a guarantee with active duty, I don't know how that is now. But there were plenty of people in my flight who were darned surprised when they got their tech school assignments.

I just hope that you guys can get someone to go with him too. It's great that you're supportive of the decision, you just want him to be fully informed, which is the best. And it's great for him to think beyond what he might do in the military. I know when my brother went in the Navy, he did gas turbine something or another (can't remember the exact title). But he was gonna do his 4 years and out. Well, he realized that the training he was getting was way better than most civilian stuff, and he ended up doing 20 years. Just retired last summer as a Chief!!

Anyway, good luck to him! And go Air Force!! Sorry, we're AF here (DH is now Reserves, and you said your DH is AF too!)

 

[Graeme]

I did four years in the British Army, getting out in 89 to join the police. I know recruiting will be different around the world but soldiers are essentially the same.

I'm not posting to give him advice, just to reassure you and let you know that even if you don't know what questions to ask, you can be sure that the army don't want square pegs in round holes. The recruiter will have asked all he needs to know about your nephew's attitude and will have dissuaded him from any jobs he thinks he's not up to, steering him towards those he thinks he would be a success at, and if he couldn't then he would have enlisted your family's help to do it.

I followed my brother into the army at 16, even though my family thought I wasn't the soldiering type. They were half right because I didn't stop for the long haul. I enjoyed what I did though and it certainly wasn't time wasted, setting me up for the rest of my life. Giving me discipline and values that my mates took years to catch up with.

Finally, if he does join up, say thanks from me! My brother is still in as a captain in the Royal Artillery. His son is a Light Dragoon in Afghanistan, and a lot of my friends are still in. Tell your nephew that his contribution is much appreciated.

 

[bengalbelle]

I did four years in the British Army, getting out in 89 to join the police. I know recruiting will be different around the world but soldiers are essentially the same.

I'm not posting to give him advice, just to reassure you and let you know that even if you don't know what questions to ask, you can be sure that the army don't want square pegs in round holes. The recruiter will have asked all he needs to know about your nephew's attitude and will have dissuaded him from any jobs he thinks he's not up to, steering him towards those he thinks he would be a success at, and if he couldn't then he would have enlisted your family's help to do it.

I followed my brother into the army at 16, even though my family thought I wasn't the soldiering type. They were half right because I didn't stop for the long haul. I enjoyed what I did though and it certainly wasn't time wasted, setting me up for the rest of my life. Giving me discipline and values that my mates took years to catch up with.

Finally, if he does join up, say thanks from me! My brother is still in as a captain in the Royal Artillery. His son is a Light Dragoon in Afghanistan, and a lot of my friends are still in. Tell your nephew that his contribution is much appreciated.

Thanks

I've been hesitant to post an update because I don't have all of the details yet, but he signed with the Marines a couple of weeks ago. He did the deferred enrollment and if I'm remembering correctly will do some type of training locally before he leaves for bootcamp.

He is supposed to get the job that he requested, so I'm crossing my fingers for him. I'm scared for him, but very proud!!

 

[ntsammy5]

I'm scared for him, but very proud!!

Me too!

 

[jmskinner]

I'm scared for him, but very proud!!

Me too. Keep us updated on how he is doing.

 

[trip]

Thanks

I've been hesitant to post an update because I don't have all of the details yet, but he signed with the Marines a couple of weeks ago. He did the deferred enrollment and if I'm remembering correctly will do some type of training locally before he leaves for bootcamp.

He is supposed to get the job that he requested, so I'm crossing my fingers for him. I'm scared for him, but very proud!!

Which job did he end up requesting?

 

[dbarker]

Thanks

I've been hesitant to post an update because I don't have all of the details yet, but he signed with the Marines a couple of weeks ago. He did the deferred enrollment and if I'm remembering correctly will do some type of training locally before he leaves for bootcamp.

He is supposed to get the job that he requested, so I'm crossing my fingers for him. I'm scared for him, but very proud!!

My DS is in the USMC. I recommend www.marinemoms.us for all families of USMC recruits. It is a wonderful site with lots of useful information. There is also a discussion board. You will find the answers to a lot of your questions on this site.

Good Luck.

Semper Fi

 

[kc10family]

Dawn,
So nice to see your name.

Marines are fabulous and I wish the best for your nephew.

 

[bengalbelle]

Which job did he end up requesting?

I don't know the exact title, but he's supposed to be going to 2 different schools, one as part of a helicoptor crew (shooting the gun in the back of the helicoptor, I think) and for some type of helicoptor maintenance. He did the delayed entry so he will be formally joining within a year. Right now he's training with other local recruits to make sure they're mentally and physically ready for bootcamp. He's very excited and really feels good about his decision.

My DS is in the USMC. I recommend www.marinemoms.us for all families of USMC recruits. It is a wonderful site with lots of useful information. There is also a discussion board. You will find the answers to a lot of your questions on this site.

Good Luck.

Semper Fi

Thank you! I'm going to check it out and I'll definitely pass this on to his mom and grandmothers.

Dawn,
So nice to see your name.

Marines are fabulous and I wish the best for your nephew.

Hi Paula, good to see you too.