wenrob
DIS Veteran
- Joined
- Apr 14, 2008
I have been following along on this thread but have avoided posting as people get highly defensive when it comes to honest discussion about obesity but this is also one of my most distinct mom memories.Mom of 4 now adults. One of my kids was a chicken nugget Mac and cheese picky eater. All 4 kids were breast fed and raised the same with home cooked meals each night.
My biggest mom guilt memory is (one time)him crying at the table because he didn't like what was served and couldn't leave the table until he tried his food.
He's now my tallest, thinnest, most adventurous and most world traveled.
So please don't pat yourself too much on the back for 'doing it right' and judge other parenting styles.
I was one of those moms who thought ‘picky’ eaters were made not born. That is until my DS came along. My twins were born five weeks early and were teeny, tiny and have been underweight their entire lives. (and still are at the age of 18 even though they are now eating me out of house and home ) Someone close to me ped called CPS on them because their child was underweight and I was terrified of that. My life became about keeping weight on these kids. DD was a great eater and would try anything but DS even as a baby wanted nothing to do with baby food or solids especially fruit or meat. I started piling on things he would eat like peanut butter, cheese, avocado, whole milk, Ranch, butter etc. while still offering up what I’d made for dinner. My DH wanted to do the sit at the table until you’ve finished your plate thing but I knew that wouldn’t work for him. One night I made chicken, broccoli and rice. DS pushed the plate away, put his head down on his arms and silently cried. It’s something that’s seared into my brain. I knew in my gut it wasn’t just being picky. Out of desperation I bribed him with a gummy bear if he would just try the broccoli. I can hear the disapproval now, lol but it worked and I have no shame. The one bite rule was implemented and after a week or two he didn’t expect or want the gummy bear.
In that time I figured out two things- definitely texture issues and two his mouth was so small and his teeth so crowded that is was very difficult for him to chew meat. (I should have realized the second sooner as I have the same problem) I never made separate meals but I started making softer cuts of meat and would not force the issue on things that would make him gag like mashed potatoes and rice. In their place he could have a double serving of veggies. Once his teeth were fixed he’s become a human eating machine. By far my most adventurous eater now and will try anything. He also still keeps trying things he doesn’t like. We still tease him about all the chicken nugget orders at fancy restaurants and Ranch (which he rarely uses now) running through his veins but I feel like fighting him at that time would have kept him in that space of only eating those things.
After this experience I’m convinced that if a kid is “picky” there’s most likely an underlying reason behind it and HUGE apologies to any parent I might have side eyed in the past. And you know what? Sometimes you just don’t like things. It’s okay for kids to have preferences too.