Hello my people! (As in PJ readers)
Do you want to hear how awesome last Thursday and Friday were? Bryan is a rockstar at sales (not quite sure what he sells-he explains it to me but all I get is "so businesses need standards, and people design standards and formulas and...." then it kind of turns into the Charlie Brown wa wa wa wa noise. Regardless, he is great at what he does and was rewarded this year. For going over his number, he and a few teammates won a trip to Hawaii. It is all expenses paid for 5 days. Wahoo! There are a few dinners he needs to attend, and some activities but hey-free trip for us! We were not sure what island but we found out today it is Maui. Never been to that island. I have been to "the big Island" and Oahu. It was surreal to me to think wow, this is so pretty as I drive down the road, then I begin to notice there are KFC's IHOP's, etc. Here I am thinking I am on a tropical island (which I was) but then you realize people live here. There are probably Targets here. Target is a glorious place. Why is it when I am in another state and see a Target I get so excited? I have two right near me but there is just something about a different Target. That was off topic as usual. But bottom line is we are going to Maui. Too bad we did not go there right after the wedding-I could have told people we were "Just Mauied" and there I would be....laughing at myself as usual. My mom said we should cancel our honeymoon to Jamaica. Let me see here: Hawaii: free=awesome. Hanging out with his fellow employees and having to be certain places at certain times=still cool but not a honeymoon. Jamaica- butlers, just the two of us (Assuming we don't kill each other), all inclusive, and drinks with umbrellas in them. Oh, and no kids. Way more awesome. I am lucky we get to go to two places. I wonder if Jamaica has a Target, or a Hobby Lobby. That would make the trip more blissful.
Friday night, we went to dinner with friends. Saturday Bryan surprised me with a Mac Book Pro laptop. I have no idea how to use it (on my PC right now) but everyone says it is better for editing photos, and well, you know I will probably be doing a LOT of editing with the castle pics we got. Maybe I am better looking blurry. I might need to think about that.... Saturday the Roots sent us the link to our wedding pictures. I could not wait to see them, but then Bryan got sick (thanks to the rum and coke he used to celebrate with for winning the trip to Hawaii.) The guy never drinks but that night he had a lot. Mucho alcohol so he was not up to doing anything and I did not have time to look at the pictures. This is where the next few days turn to cr*ap.
Sunday we picked up the kids and went to Ft. Collins to see his Dad and stepmom who were in town. We got them from their Mom's house and they were sick. EVERY TIME (yes, I am yelling) we get them back, they are sick. Camden woke up at 4 that morning, and then all day he did not feel well. He had a fever, it was a mess. It was the longest 90 minutes of a ride home.
Yesterday there was no school and the kids were so rowdy. But as soon as Bryan came home, Camden turned on the couch, the "I have a sore throat, I am hot" etc. I told B not to fall for it. Last night, being the newlyweds that we are, Bryan and I were up all night long...tending to a sick 3 year old. We are no strangers to romance. Torrin was up ALL night screaming saying his head hurt. He refuses to take grape medicine (um, it is delicious and it is grape. When I was a kid it tasted like a*s. They claimed it tasted like bubble gum when I was a kid, and well, it tasted more like toxic waste. So we were up all night. I had to tell the parent of the kid I watch that he could not come over today. Bryan left at 5 and Torrin was awake and screaming. We laid on the couch, watched endless hours of Dora the Explorer, I finally got him to take the grape medicine (who knew letting him sip it from the cup with a bendy straw would work? But then again, bendy straws rock). His head feels better, he stops screaming, and as he lays on me, he tells me he is going to be sick. I say hold on, let me get something. I move about a foot and he throws up every where. The couch, down the cushions, on the dog (and of course the dog is white and is a puppy so he thinks everything is yummy and is licking it. Go ahead and throw up now too...) on three blankets, on all the dry clean only pillows, all over his jammies, etc. I have 4 nephews and a niece. I have babysat more times than I could count. I have never had to clean up kid puke. Let me just say it was not awesome. Nor is the smell that lingers.
What is my point in telling you all of this? Well, because I am random, and it also explains why I still have not had time to write about the wedding. Being the picture freak that I am, I still have not looked at all the pictures from the wedding either. I just don't want it to end and I am having a hard time knowing that for months, my main focus in my life was planning a wedding. Now it is taking care of a puppy, a man, two little kids, and lots of puke today. I want to go back to that day. Redo things that went wrong, change things, but I can't. I don't know how to move forward from this. I have been so sad, and today did not help. I fear if I write about the wedding, this PJ turns into a completed TR and then....nothing. I read about people planning 2012 weddings and I am envious. I see things people did I never would have dreamed of. I think I could have kept my reception at the GF and got SO many more pictures if we did not have to go from the WP to the BW-but when it was booked, we thought more people were coming. I loved the Boardwalk. I did. I loved everything about it. I need to focus on the amazing things that happened. Out of the 1500 pictures I have looked at so far, do you know what I noticed? The pictures that are missing. The moments I remember, that people talk about, but there are no pictures of. Why can't I just focus on the awesome shots we got? Granted, they are small on the screen like the castle ones were so maybe when I get them on CD I will be bummed but I am not going to think like that. Why am I not someone who can focus on the great things?! I am so lucky in so many ways. No, my life turned out nothing like I had planned. Nothing at all, but it is good. I am grateful, but I also suck at realizing just how good it all is. My mom asked me if I had watched our video. One time. I sobbed and I am worried about when I get it back. Will it send me into a tail spin? I have been in a fog for months, mostly because of the ear issue, but there is something else going on. I just want to feel "right." I just can't move on from the fact that I waited my whole life for that day, and it went by in the blink of an eye. I am holding off on writing about the day (mostly because I want to show you the professional pics as well and we dont have the jpegs yet) and also because it will really be over. This is the only thing I have left tying me to that day. Man, I am so depressing. Forgive me.
Still waiting to hear back from Disney on the pics. I am spending a ton of time editing the ones I have right now. Maybe on the Mac I can make it so the pictures aren't 90% crooked. Or I can make all the pictures of me sitting in a random chair with a blurry Bryan in the background, into me on Dumbo or something
I had my consult for the braces this week. When I went in they showed me the waiting room with Donkey Kong and Pac Man. They showed me where to brush teeth. I learned if you are on time, you get tokens and the tokens get you rewards. I looked at the reward chart, noticed Chuck E Cheese gift cards and began to think....hmmmm....strange, but then I thought, nothing really beats skee ball and pizza. Then they show me the chairs with TVs and movies above them. I notice it is a Disney movie, and fight the urge to flip it the bird due to my recent photo anger, but I ignore. They tell me there are game boys at every chair. I then tell the lady, this is all great but I am here for me, not my kids. She says Oh! Well let me take you to the adult rooms. It sounded dirty but it wasn't
No TV's. No Game Boys (she said she could get me one-I prefer a daiquiri thank you very much. Kidding...) I tell her if I am allowed to, I will be participating in the token program as I will be the model patient. She tells me I have great teeth, why am there. I show her and make her listen to my jaw and she gets it. She says it is really bad and I think this makes her feel like I should get a free pass to do the token thing. I meet with the orthodontist who has crazy perfect teeth (which make me feel like my teeth are going to horrify him). I spend two hours there and find out I get to have them on for 2 years and they are metal. Wires and all. Brackets, rubber bands, etc. No head gear, which is really sad because hear gear rocks. They are going to see if the braces help reset the bite and the jaw before doing the surgery. Sadly, I will look like the little brace face girl from Finding Nemo for 2 long years. I might get better radio reception though....They tell me, "At least you already have a husband before you get them put on." Sweet.
Please forgive me that I have been avoiding the wedding day talk. If you have even read this, I appreciate it so much. I would love to write a book one day-no idea about what or who would read it-and writing is my free therapy. I should post this stuff on my non wedding blog but no one reads that so I vent here. But it kind of has to do with the wedding.
Once the kid stops puking, I will upload some wedding pics and tell you all about it. The good and the bad. But there were so many great things!!! (see, that was me attempting to be positive and peppy
-two traits I am seriously lacking in lately.
One more thing: What is the point of this icon???
Every time I see it I think, "I should not be on the computer. I should be doing laundry." I wish they would take it down. I also wish this guy
would wave his wand (not meant to imply something dirty) and make this post depression sadness go away. Maybe a trip to Hobby Lobby might help a little....
Thanks for reading-I really mean that. I have "met" some amazing people on here and I am so grateful. I genuinely mean that, and it is not an effort to say that because I am really thrilled about that. I said the word "that" way too many times in that last sentence.
Have a good day/night!
Dani Downer