Do you and spouse/significant share a room?

[Julie's Haircut]

Yes, DW and I generally sleep together, but there are plenty of nights where she falls asleep on the sofa watching TV and doesn't come to bed until 2am. And I sometimes wake up to pee, then go sleep on the sofa for an hour or two before returning to bed.

Sometimes at a hotel we'll sleep in separate beds.

My parents slept in different bedrooms for as long as I can remember, probably due to his snoring. My brother and I shared the so-called master. (No master bath). I grew up thinking that was the norm. I was surprised when I learned, probably about age 8, that spouses actually were supposed to share a bed.

 

[Ephany]

Up to about 3 months ago, I would have checked the 'I want my own room' option. DH's snoring is bad. Like I can hear him with earplugs in, doors shut, him upstairs and me on the couch downstairs bad. He finally agreed to be tested and he has severe sleep apnea. His CPAP has been life changing for both of us. I actually get a full night's sleep and wake up feeling rested so I'm much less grouchy. He's sleeping better and the filters on the machine have helped with his allergies. I still want my own room for my hobbies and my foster kittens but I no longer dread sleeping with him.

Oh, and I really think more people sleep apart than will admit to it. My boss mentioned it the other day and it's because he has to have the AC on full blast and his wife likes it sweltering hot. I would never have guessed, they seem very devoted to each other. Getting a good night's sleep is soooo important, I don't think sleeping apart is a reflection on the health of anyone's marriage.

 

[dish rag]

Together. We are very close, sleep in our birthday suits and hold each other all night long. Most nights we both wake around 2 or 3 am and talk for awhile. We are sometimes apart for a few weeks at a time so when we are together we stay together.

 

[loves to dive]

We sleep in separate rooms. Honey snores so loud I can even still hear him on a different floor and the opposite of the house with both doors closed. I'm a light sleeper and used to get up in the middle of the night and go to another room when he woke me up but once I'm awake I have problems going to back to sleep so I'd end up getting maybe 3 hours of sleep at night. I tried ear plugs but have small ear canals and after trying about 4 types, when I found a type that would actually stay in my ear, they didn't even make a dent in the snoring and hurt my ears. After a while he just started sleeping in another room. We've been together 24 years (had our anniversary Sunday) and will sleep together when travelling and it doesn't make our relationship any better or worse for not sleeping in the same bed.

 

[Soldier's*Sweeties]

My husband works nights and goes to sleep as I'm waking up so we rarely sleep at the same time. He snores... REALLY loud so I'm okay with it.

 

[mamacatnv]

interesting so far.
Can y'all see the actual percentages?

18.4% said Yes
6.5% said no but would like it
2.2% said No because partner would never go for it

that's approx 25% who either have their own room or would like to - interesting......

 

[3monkeys4me]

We share a room and we are happy to share the vast majority of the time. Our current house is temporary since we wont live in this area for very long but when we move a get settled we are planning on a house with at least one spare bedroom so that we can sleep separately on occasion, like when one of us is sick or just can't sleep. Also, my husband has a really weird work schedule that has him coming and going at all hours. It would be nice for him to have a place where he can sleep undisturbed during the day if needed. For now, he just sleeps in our room but that means I can't go in there. I try to plan ahead but it can be difficult at times.

My in laws share a room but before my mother in law retired she slept in the guest room on her on call nights, so that she didn't disturb my FIL when she was called in.

 

[goofy4tink]

Dh and I have been together for 35yrs, married for 26! About 10 years ago, he had knee surgery. He didn't sleep well because he was so worried I would bang into him, in my sleep. King bed. And he snores, horribly! He goes to bed much earlier than I do, and is up about an hour or so before me. So, he moved to our guest room! Well. After a few nights, he told me that, while he missed sleeping together, he was sleeping much better! No one was nudging him all night, telling him to roll over! So, he has stayed there. When we travel, I bring earplugs, which help since we go to bed at the same time!!
Yes, he had a sleep study done e. No sleep apnea, but a severely deviated septum...less than 50/50 chance it would work if he tried surgery, and because there was no apnea, not covered by insurance. So, it works for us. And he gets to sleep with the dog, which I'm not terribly fond of doing!!

 

[Kathryn Merteuil]

When I was with my EX, I had my own room. Now that I am with somebody else, I actually enjoy sharing the bedroom. I like having him near me.

 

[georgina]

I sleep SO much better alone, now that all the kids are gone we have the space. We'll be married 30 years in October, he snores horribly (has had a sleep study). I am a light sleeper, he sleeps through thunderstorms. I need the room dark and quiet to sleep.

 

[AP1209]

Same room, same bed but separate blankets. I like a thinner blanket and DW uses the thick bed comforter. Works great for us

 

[Nhebron]

Op, I don't think sleeping or not sleeping in the same bed as your SO is that big a deal. It certainly isn't an indicator of the health of your relationship.

I have a bad habit of falling asleep while watching tv. Dh used to wake me to go to bed and then I'd be up for hours. I asked him to please just let me sleep and when I woke on my own I'd come to bed.

Some nights I'm on the family room couch all night.

There isn't anything wrong with our marriage. I don't need to be in a bed with my husband every night.

My parents shared a room but not a bed and managed to have 4 children.

Whatever works for both of you is all that matters.

Agree!

 

[runwad]

I'm having a hard time envisioning the same bed but separate sheets and blankets? I can't imagine how I can make that bed? I can't tuck the sheets in, I feel it would be messy, therefore not for me. Of course ,DH doesn't sleep in the sheets he folds them over or down so we don't have that problem.

 

[NHdisneylover]

I'm having a hard time envisioning the same bed but separate sheets and blankets? I can't imagine how I can make that bed? I can't tuck the sheets in, I feel it would be messy, therefore not for me. Of course ,DH doesn't sleep in the sheets he folds them over or down so we don't have that problem.

In much if Europe there is no top sheet. There's a duvet with a removable cover that you wash when you wash the bottom sheet. Most people have 2-3 duvets so you can change them out for warmer or cooler weather. The duvets are folded neatly on either side of the bed

 

[PollyannaMom]

I'm having a hard time envisioning the same bed but separate sheets and blankets? I can't imagine how I can make that bed? I can't tuck the sheets in, I feel it would be messy, therefore not for me. Of course ,DH doesn't sleep in the sheets he folds them over or down so we don't have that problem.

This:

In much if Europe there is no top sheet. There's a duvet with a removable cover that you wash when you wash the bottom sheet. Most people have 2-3 duvets so you can change them out for warmer or cooler weather. The duvets are folded neatly on either side of the bed

But, if you were decorating it "American style," I think you would use one fitted bottom sheet, and two top sheets, each smaller than what would be called for by the bed size. They would both be tucked in at the bottom (and the side if you liked) but would simply overlap a bit in the middle when "made up." The same goes for the bedspreads (if that's what you were using). You would, for instance, buy 2 coordinating twin spreads for a larger bed, let them hang down on either side, and overlap them a bit in the middle. I would think it best to choose one without ruffles, but otherwise, it would just look like a seam in the middle.