July 2023 W.I.S.H. Thread, Hello Sunshine!☀️

Happy Friday Everyone!!

I have been tracking good the last few days, laundry is piling back up but that’s due to the plumbing issues so now that that is fixed I will be back on top of the laundry starting tomorrow and I’m not working late cause I’m on vacation 😎

Watching my niece today and DH and I are going out to dinner this evening, tomorrow we volunteer then I will be packing for us to leave for the beach Sunday!!! DD is scheduled to arrive home from camp at 5pm tomorrow, I can’t wait to see her!!

I did my grocery pickups today so I have all our snacks and beach foods ready to go!! Getting excited!
 
I had to look back on page 1 -
My main goal this month is to be more mindful of what I'm eating...

I also plan to keep up with my regular walking goal in the exercise thread.

Yes, I have been more mindful of food, especially snacks. My strategies have been to replace some high-calorie afternoon snacks with cottage cheese (with everything bagel seasoning) and celery, and to chew sugar-free gum instead of snacking in the evening.

And yes, I am keeping up with my walking minutes. (I need to catch up with posting them, but I am doing them.)
 
SOCIAL SATURDAY

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Finding and making friends seemed to strike a chord earlier in the week. Since this is Social Saturday let's chat about it a bit more. PAsFab5 has already made the excellent suggestion to volunteer, what are some other suggestions to try? What is important to you in a friendship, what are you looking for? What are some aspects of your most fulfilling friendships?
 
I've been poking around the innerwebs reading a few things on making friends as an adult, including suggestions on where to go and what to do and the idea of reading groups came up. I thought that would be a good one for me as it would also help me keep on track reading. Suggestions on where to find reading groups are local book stores and libraries. True confession... in the six months I've lived here it never occurred to me that we have a library! And better yet I've been driving past it on a regular basis, like several times a week. As it turns out there's an interesting lecture coming up in a couple weeks, so I've made note of it and will attend, and I'll visit the library tomorrow after I go to the Farmer's Market as it is just down the street.

What I'm looking for is a couple like-minded girl friends to do things with... my Golden Girls Squad. I know they're here somewhere.
 
what are some other suggestions to try?
I signed up for some low-cost senior classes through a local college. Since most of them have been over Zoom, there hasn't been a lot of socialization outside of class, but I do feel like I've "gotten to know" some of the other participants a bit. If I ran into them, we'd recognize each other and chat. It's a step.

I keep meaning to meet up with a local hiking group, but the weather here has not cooperated with the conjunctions of their and my schedules, so I haven't tried that yet.

What is important to you in a friendship, what are you looking for?
Balance - I'm an Introvert, so I want to find friends who'd like to hang out sometimes, but don't need attention 24/7.

For the same reason, I really enjoy "built in socialization" - like clubs that meet once a week (or month) because I don't have to make a special effort to set up the interaction.

(For that, I kind of need to be adopted by an extrovert. :rotfl: ) ~

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A "friendship regret" I have is from a few years ago. I was taking the twins I watched to storytime at the library every week, and really should have connected afterward with one of the other moms. We had a lot in common, but were both hesitating in the introvert role, and didn't make the effort to get together after the program ended. I wish I had been braver and just texted her to go for coffee or something.

What are some aspects of your most fulfilling friendships?
Right now, my most fulfilling friendship is with a neighbor because we share a healthy goal of walking in the summers - so I get great chats and fitness in one package.

Like the original example, though, I made some of my best friends over the years from volunteering!
 
Catching up after a few busy days.

I've had some good success on the health front. I was able to keep up my workout routine with week, with today being a rest day and then tomorrow being slated for 4.5 miles. I just need to make sure I wake up early to get out because, even by 8am, it's dreadful outside.

I had my first bloodwork since chemo finished and I officially have an immune system again. My doc had said it takes 4-6 weeks to rebound and I was worried I'd be on the longer end of that because of how low my counts were, but I'm good to go with indoor dining, skipping the mask, etc. Tonight, we're doing hibachi to celebrate.

I'm finding weight loss to be very challenging right now. I've been consistent with exercise and diet, but I was essentially at a plateau for the last two weeks. I know my body is still very much recovering from chemo but I had hoped, with being able to increase my exercise regularity and manage my food, that I would have seen more solid movement. I did see some movement on the scale today, so hopefully this was just a rough patch and I can get things going now. I certainly don't have a lot of weight that I want to lose, I really just want to get back to where I feel like my clothes fit me correctly, but it seems that even that few pounds is going to be tough going.

what are some other suggestions to try? What is important to you in a friendship, what are you looking for? What are some aspects of your most fulfilling friendships?

I very much end up making friends based on where I am in my life, which right now means other parents of my kids' friends. Even with us having the kids in common, I feel like everyone is so busy that we barely find time to get together socially. It's mostly group texting with us trying to coordinate a girls night but not finding a date that lines up. I do have one close friend that I get to see regularly because she's also my running buddy, so we have 4 weekly chats while we're getting our miles in.
 
What are some other suggestions to try?
Organized groups i.e., places of worship, book clubs, YMCA classes, reconnecting with old friends through social media, neighborhood, work.
What is important to you in a friendship, what are you looking for?
Depends on the person…fun, socializing, support, ride or die. Not every person is capable of fulfilling every need, so it’s important to realize what someone can contribute to a friendship and not ask more of them. I have some very busy friends who can only give me limited time and I accept that because when we do get together it’s fun.
What are some aspects of your most fulfilling friendships?
Trust is number one. I can’t have another toxic relationship. Too many people have hurt me deeply, so I hesitate to go all in. I have many colleagues that I am friendly with, but I only have a handful of true work friends that I truly trust.

As you all know, I recently had a 40th reunion with my childhood beach friend. She lives very far away so we’re long distance friends. We plan on meeting up at our beach annually and keeping in touch through texting and social media throughout the year.

My school BFF and I still see each other in the summer so she’s probably my closest friend right now.

I’m trying to get closer to a neighbor of mine. We help each other as good neighbors do, but I would like to become genuine friends. I’m not sure if she is interested in being more than friendly neighbors…time will tell.

I recently had dinner with an old friend and plan on continuing that relationship. I plan on revisiting old friendships when we return to our old church. Hopefully that goes well. We won’t be going until after vacation because we have major storms coming through tomorrow.


I don’t feel the need to explore other avenues at this time since I don’t really have free time during the school year, and I need to have enough time for DD and DH.
 
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Hi just wondering is it too late to join in?
I know we are halfway through the month but I just wondered if I could join ( was scrolling through new posts section of the Dis and found you there) or do I need to wait until the start of August?
Welcome! Just set a few goals for the remainder of the month and jump right in!
 
Thanks all for the warm welcome. I’m Moira from the north of Ireland. Mum of 3, granny of 2 and live with my husband and 2 sons. My daughter is married and has the 2 wee ones ( a boy aged 5 and a girl who’s almost 2). I’m so lucky to see them all often as they only live about 5 minutes away and I look after the wee boy after school. My daughter is a special needs teacher, my eldest son is a teacher and my youngest is a 16 ye old and still at school. As you can tell unlike @TheOneWithTheTriplets my kids are years apart 😂. 8 years between the first 2 and 9 between the second and the “surprise” child ( I may have thought I had hypothyroidism/early menopause 😂). Anyhow my goal is to lose some weight and get in better shape than I am now. I am 3 years post mastectomy and anc and while that first year was tough with surgeries and chemo/radio I made a real effort to eat well. Exercise was limited as I had to shield due to the pandemic and then my lovely friends/family and neighbours deposited lots of sweet treats and the like in our doorstep and I ate my way through them thinking life is short and I gained too much weight.
This week I want to track what I eat/ eat what I’ve planned and try to drink 8 glasses of water a day 😊
 
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Luv that pie chart @PollyannaMom I am definitely the adopted friend. Worked out well though as just finished up a lovely little shindig for DS 10s birthday with a couple of his friends over for pool time and cake. Had a great time chatting with the other moms...actually went out with 2 of them earlier in the week. I find I don't make friends easily but when I do we tend to stick together for a long time.
Hasn't been a great week for eating but doing well with water intake and getting some veggies in. Did make roasted sweet potatoes the other night with some fun spices and they ended up sweet/savory and it was sssuuuupppeeerrr yummy.
 
SELF-CARE SUNDAY

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Part of self-care can be self-soothing... using pleasant, comforting and calming activities to move your mind away from unwanted thoughts and feelings. Some examples of self-soothing are:

listening to music, calming sounds or white noise
mindfully cooking or eating
mediation
breathwork
soothing touch, like petting a cat or a dog

Do you have a method of self-soothing that works well for you?

And what self-care activities are you planning for yourself today?
 
SOCIAL SATURDAY



Finding and making friends seemed to strike a chord earlier in the week. Since this is Social Saturday let's chat about it a bit more. PAsFab5 has already made the excellent suggestion to volunteer, what are some other suggestions to try? What is important to you in a friendship, what are you looking for? What are some aspects of your most fulfilling friendships?

Good topic - I agree volunteering is a good way to meet like-minded friends. I think another place would be community events, but they might be hard to initially attend by yourself. Near us, we have weekly music in the park and events held my our county art council working on adults learning new art skills.

Like some others in this thread, I'm also an introvert, so I'm mostly content doing things myself or just myself and my family. As I get older though, I do want to work on cultivating my friendships. As DH and I get closer to retirement, I know there will be many more hours to fill during the day. I'm hoping to have more time to do things to meet more people as well as occupy my time.

My mom is a much more social person than I am and is my role model as far as friendships go. My dad passed away 19 years ago, so she was a young-ish widow at 60. She still misses him terribly to this day, but she has such strong friendships because she takes the time to cultivate them. She is very generous with her time and just a very caring person. Many of her friendships have started and developed from church relationships, but not all of them.

Some of the things she has done / does to cultivate her friendships:
  • She helps plan her class reunions each year (at some point they decided to start having one each summer) which had rekindled relationships she had with classmates from years ago. She's then very good at calling those ladies to get together after the planning is over for the year.
  • She takes food to families at church who have had surgeries / babies, etc. This keep her involved with people - they often go out of their way to do nice things for her / include her with group activities they may know about.
  • She volunteers at our local hospital re-sale shop. Most of the volunteers are retired ladies like her and she has developed many friendships with them.
  • She has always liked hosting things and always invites small groups of people to her home for various occasions. She was the church organist for years and always had a choir party at Christmas, etc. This is turn gets her invited to other occasions with those people.
  • She invites people out for a birthday lunch even if they are not super close friendship wise. That may sound a little weird to those of us who aren't very social, but it gets her a lot a meals out with different people and she has developed many relationships from that.
I really don't think she does any of that specifically to get friends, it's just a by-product of the way she lives her life.
 
Do you have a method of self-soothing that works well for you?
I find walking outdoors, whatever the weather, really helps me to destress. Somehow being in nature just grounds me in the here and now. Walking by the sea is my favourite especially on a stormy day but most often I simply head out for a walk from home so tends to be alongside the River Lagan.
I’ve just recently returned home from a family holiday in Donegal and our bedroom faced the Lough. We left the windows open and I fell asleep each night to the sound of the waves lapping the shore. It was such a soothing way to end the day and made for a restful night. If I ever won the lottery I’d buy a house by the sea. :goodvibes

And what self-care activities are you planning for yourself today?
Today I am going to sit down with the food planner I filled out yesterday and work out what groceries I need ( and then go get them) so I am prepared for the week ahead. I have a family of fussy eaters that I have no problem catering for but somehow I always let my needs fall to the bottom and just eat whatever suits everyone else even if it’s not what suits me. Today I am changing that by putting my needs up there and making sure I hit my nutrition goals. I won’t let them starve lol as I have planned things that either they can eat or that can be adapted for them or alternatives that are easy to cook either alongside my meals or by the boys. Only right to provide them with some essential life skills by getting them to cook their own dinner occasionally right! I mean they are 25 and 16 so not babies. I was a mum by 25 so cooking an odd dinner isn’t going to do them any harm and will allow me to focus on what I need to do for me.
 
Do you have a method of self-soothing that works well for you?

I've been relying a lot on yoga lately to calm my nerves. I like getting moving for a bit and it's impossible to engage in stress eating from down dog, lol!

And what self-care activities are you planning for yourself today?

I just finished 4.5 mile run, my longest yet since last summer. Other than that, I might go wild and shop somewhere indoors without a mask! Actually, I did the weekly family food shopping yesterday for the first time this year, so that would make it two in one weekend. Look at me going wild. :rotfl2:
 
I find walking outdoors, whatever the weather, really helps me to destress. Somehow being in nature just grounds me in the here and now. Walking by the sea is my favourite especially on a stormy day but most often I simply head out for a walk from home so tends to be alongside the River Lagan.
I’ve just recently returned home from a family holiday in Donegal and our bedroom faced the Lough. We left the windows open and I fell asleep each night to the sound of the waves lapping the shore. It was such a soothing way to end the day and made for a restful night. If I ever won the lottery I’d buy a house by the sea. :goodvibes
I’m with you. I love the ocean. I have always lived a short drive from the beach. The idea of being landlocked actually frightens me. I need access to a beach to walk and clear my head.

I grew up going on beach vacations every summer. WDW is the only non-beach vacation that I enjoy. When we went to Disneyland, we couldn’t wait to see the Pacific Ocean, walk the beach and watch the surfers. In June and July, we go on beach vacations in Cape Cod, Massachusetts, and we stay at a beach front resort on Cape Cod Bay. I find beach walks to be so relaxing and I am able to think so clearly by the ocean. The sound of the waves lull me to sleep at night. Sitting alone on our porch watching the waves while I drink my morning coffee is one of my favorite things to do.

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