Deluxe resorts offer close proximity to at least one theme park. AS Planner2012 said, your favourite/most visited park is nice to have conveniently next to your resort. MK resorts are the CR, GF and Poly plus the WL. Epcot area resorts are YC/BC and BWI plus the Swan and Dolphin. The Animal Kingdom resort is the AKL.
Two other parameters that help people choose a deluxe are theme and price. Some are quite a bit more costly than others. Monorail resorts tend to be the priciest, then Epcot resorts and finally the WL and AKL. WL and AKL rooms are smaller than those at other deluxe resorts and sleep 4 not 5. Themes are very different and many truly love the immersive atmosphere of WDW hotels. You really ned to look online at pics of each one to get an idea of which style would suit your family best.
We have stayed in all of them and we prefer the MK area resorts. It is magical to me to see the castle from our resort and to walk, take a boat or ride the monorail to the MK. Perhaps the Poly might be my absolute favourite, but it is really really close. The GF and CR tower are just wonderful as well.
If your children love swimming, the the YC/BC would be a great choice with Storm Along Bay. It is a nice pool for teenagers, IMO. Our kids loved it when they were the age of yours now. Also, walking in to Epcot and even DHS (a little further away) is really nice.
Have fun choosing!! Picking which deluxe resort is a wonderful experience. I am sure that you will just love whichever one you finally choose!