The Janky Stroller Rides Again COMPLETE

[Northern Disney Girl]

Welcome. You will understand the cold descriptions then.

Oh I absolutely do!!!

We Northerners have to stick together - for warmth! LOL

 

[browneyedgirl1683]

Definitely following, as your trip was just before mine Can relate to the all pink outfit. We could only fly to MCO with my 2.5 year old in her Vampirina shirt and leggings, and then she would only fly back in her nightgown.

I'm jealous of the GoGo setup. We used a boring old car-seat backpack.

 

[MikeWsGirl]

Definitely following, as your trip was just before mine Can relate to the all pink outfit. We could only fly to MCO with my 2.5 year old in her Vampirina shirt and leggings, and then she would only fly back in her nightgown.

I'm jealous of the GoGo setup. We used a boring old car-seat backpack.

I think our daughters are twins. In Winnipeg, coming home, I was like ‘Claudia, remember how cold it was outside when we left? It’s STILL that cold.’ Even then, I couldn’t convince her to remove the short sleeve and shorts crab jammies. I finally had to send in the enforcer, also known as David, who enjoys putting his foot down.

I may never fly again for five years just to avoid the whole moving car seats debacle. They are so so heavy and bulky.

 

[MikeWsGirl]

January 30th 2022 – Child Projectiles: Part Two​

The night was chilly though. Nothing compared to transporting sleepy children in a light jacket layered over a sweatshirt to a freezing car at minus thirty Celsius– the transfer we’d done that morning – but chilly.

The Floridians were shivering in their winter coats. There was no one at the tables outside the Boardwalk ice cream shop. People even stopped to comment on us. I replied that we came from a place with temperatures of minus fifty and northern lights.

The kids had Mickey sundaes complete with Oreo ears and a maraschino cherry tail. I had a jalapeño cheese stuffed pretzel with cheese sauce. It was better than you can imagine.

Caption: My pretzel evaporated so I helped Claudia with her Mickey sundae.

While sitting there, enjoying the night and each other’s company, we watched as an eight year old flew past, pushing her six year old brother in a running stroller. He wasn’t strapped in and was one crack in the boardwalk away from becoming a human catapult.

Everyone was happy but exhausted by the time we got back to the hotel room to sleep.

January 31st 2022 – Licking ‘Cheampeen’ and other Questionable Parenting Decisions​

The kids slept in until eight! Eight! They’ve never been ready so fast in their lives. Every night before we went to bed, I’d put out their outfits for the day. I’d wanted to have more coordinated family outfits but I only ended up with three Mike Wazowski sweat shirts for David Clark and me. Claudia had a Minnie sweater from Auntie Dee.

Caption: Someone is way too excited about taking her children to the Magic Kingdom. Tone down the crazy eyes Mom.

Claudia and I had Mike t-shirts. Buzz and Woody shirts for Clark, David and my Dad. I also had a Woody shirt. It was a men’s small so I had to remove reams of fabric so it fit me. Even with taking two inches off the width of the sleeves they are baggy. We also had a family set of Toy Story Alien clothing. Claudia and I had dresses and Clark and David had t-shirts. I had to make an entirely new shirt for Clark out of the men’s small Alien shirt.

Caption: Kid, if you’re this tired before our first park day, imagine how you’ll feel in two weeks.

I let Dad know that today was a Buzz day so he could match Clark. I’d bought Poptarts to eat on the run rather than their standard Apple Jacks. We missed the first Magic Kingdom bus but the next one came within minutes.

The Disney buses are always special but they’ve started wrapping the buses to put characters on them or to promote new movies so pulling up to the Magic Kingdom was extra exciting because the kids were pointing to all of the characters on the buses. Claudia said, “I saw a Mickey Dog bus.” We also saw a Mike and Sully bus and were debating sprinting to get a photo when it pulled out of the circle.

There were problems with the tickets but the kids were patient as guest relations fixed it. Then David got in the world’s longest line for coffee. If I had to do the trip over again, I would have packed fewer toys and packed our coffee drips, a small kettle and travel mugs. Clark’s face lit up when he saw the castle, “I want to go there!” It was like the castle had a pull on him; I wanted to walk through the castle with the kids but we had to wait for David.

Caption: First family bus ride at Disney. Everyone smile! Oh wait, masks. Right.

One of the lone remaining quiet spots at Disney is around the corner from the coffee place. It’s an alley where there are cheerful tables with umbrellas set up. You can listen to someone getting piano lessons above. I pulled out the kids’ snack bags while we were waiting. My friend Terri had made them for us. Claudia had a princess one and Clark’s was Donkey Kong. The kids and I went to meet Mickey and agreed to meet David when we were done.

The line to meet Mickey was short and fast moving. The kids got to watch Mickey interact with a couple of other groups before it was our turn. At Pearson, I had picked up three bags of Canadian candy: one maple nougat, one maple candy in the shape of a maple leaf and an ice wine candy in the shape of a maple leaf. All of the candies were individually wrapped making them perfect character gifts.

Mickey stood behind a barrier because the characters still aren’t allowed to hug. Clark handed his candies to Mickey’s character attendant but Claudia got to crawl under the velvet ropes to give hers to the big cheese. Mickey picked the candies up off the floor and deposited them in his magic hat.

With one of the other guests, Mickey had mimed being old and walking with a cane. That really stood out to Clark. He also kept asking why Mickey wouldn’t talk. I explained that the characters are actually very shy.

Everyone cooed over how cute the kids were (finally) with Mickey then we found David outside. After that we went to figure out my disability pass.

We interrupt your regularly scheduled Trip Report with a desperately boring explanation​

I have Erythropoietic Protoporphyria. It’s a blood disorder that affects my skin. I’m missing a step in the heme synthesis pathway. Oxygen attaches to heme in the red blood cells. If you know someone else with porphyria, I can guarantee that I do not have their type of porphyria. There are eight steps in the heme synthesis pathway and each of the porphyrias is missing a different one. All of them cause strange, crazy symptoms. And all of them are ridiculously rare.

When I’m exposed to light, the mutant heme bits create free radicals that are basically toxins. And I turn bright red. This happens after minutes in the sun. After a morning on the beach I feel like I’ve downed twelve tequilas only without the fun bit because the whole process of sun exposure is acutely painful.

It’s a disease that gets worse as I get older. I don’t know why, no one knows why. It’s part of the fun of rare diseases. So things that I used to do, like go to Disney in shorts, the way I did five years ago, or being a lifeguard, are now impossible.

Oh another part of the fun is, it isn’t sunlight, it’s visible light. That means camera flashes, in quick succession, also burn me.

But things are not all grim. Yes, I do need to cover up every single solitary inch of my skin, but it means that I run around looking like some sort of knock off super villain which to be honest was always my dream.

Caption: Even super villains need a vacation.

In order to go outside, I wear long pants, long sleeves, long gloves over the long sleeves because the more layers the better, a neckerchief, a Covid mask because it’s still a pandemic and a weird face covering that loops over my ears and goes from the bridge of my nose to my clavicle. Also a big, giant hat obviously.

I can burn ten feet from windows, in the shade, on a cloudy day, through curtains and under fluorescent lights. I am truly a super villain but with the worst super power ever.

Porphyria affects all tissues that are exposed to light and in recent years my eyes have become super sensitive to light. I get the equivalent of snow blindness from being out on a normal day. I have red goggles which cut down the specific wavelength of light which burns me; 400 nm or blue light but the goggles also affect my depth perception and make me feel like I’m living on mars.

The fun doesn’t even stop once I get out of the sun. Skin that was exposed to light thickens and hardens. Because I’ve had minimal light exposure, I fortunately have little scarring from porphyria but I now get weird red dots if I’m silly enough to show any part of myself to the sun. The areas also swell up and become painful to the touch and in the case of my face, painful to move.

I don’t like to talk about my porphyria because

1. My disease is so rare and unique that most of the time when I’m experiencing negative effects from it, I feel like I’m crazy.
2. When I figure out how to use my superpower to take over the world, I want it to be a surprise.

In recognition of how difficult it is for me to exist at Disney let alone try to enjoy Disney, our favourite thoughtful mouse gives me a Disability pass which lets me schedule whatever rides I want and wait in a place where I will be minimally harmed by the sun. Clark calls this my Lightning Pass and is a huge fan.


Caption: My hope in confessing all of this is that Drizella and Anastasia will give me a big yellow and orange dress and let me live with them. People always need dreams. The only drawback would be the cat, I'm more of a pet-rock sort fo person.

We now return to your regularly scheduled trip report​

The line was long but moved quickly. Clark was completely obsessed with cotton candy. Dad and Jen were coming into the park so I had to wait at the entrance to give them their tickets while David took the kids to Winnie the Pooh.



The Imagineers overhauled a number of ride queues a couple of years ago and did wonders with the Winnie the Pooh queue, installing a variety of activities to keep kids happy while they wait. Claudia adored what she called the hunny pot ride.

I sat in a shaded corner near the entrance with a sweater over my head. Recently my eyes have been bugging me and I’d only worn my sunglasses rather than my weird, red goggles. After we found Dad and Jen, we went to Peter Pan. Thanks to my disability pass, we didn’t have to wait.

Caption: A rare photo of a genuine Clark smile. It was one of the few we captured during the trip. Clark refuses to look at a camera and smile at the same time; he'll do one or the other.

I rode with Clark and a cast member stood and sprinkled pixie dust on the ships as they took off. This resonated with Clark and he talked about it many times afterward. He asked questions about it like where did they get the pixie dust and did I have any while I worked there? How did the pixie dust work? Clark was excited to see everything. I pointed out all the tiny details like Peter Pan and the children flying across the moon.

Watching Clark and Claudia’s delight reminded me how much Diana and I had loved Peter Pan’s ride when we were little. After we got back from Disney World, we would turn off the lights in my room and sit on my bed pretending that it was the flying ship. I hoped that my kids would find the experience equally wonderful and want to relive it.

Next we went on the carousel. Even though Claudia was tired by this point, she still wanted to ride. I loved watching the pure happiness on Clark’s face as he bobbed up and down on his horse. David stood next to Claudia, holding her on. She was utterly enchanted as she spun around and around.



Caption: My Dad would not be this excited on a real horse.
Caption: I swear half of this picture is my big ol' blue Mom butt.Also I took off my weird face covering to make it a better picture, photo fail. Oh well.


From there we went to the Little Mermaid. Clark rode with Dad and Jen so David and I sat with Claudia between us in our own clamshell.
Caption: Claudia's little baby face looked scared here before I blurred it out. She was very much a lap baby this trip.

I loved the wide eyed wonder on Claudia’s face. The Little Mermaid is the best new dark ride that the Imagineers have released in years. The part with all of the fish singing and dancing to ‘Under the Sea’ is an ocean of colour and music. It’s marvellous.

Watching Claudia recoil in fear at the Ursula animatronic, I saw again how scary that character was. That was undoubtedly the best part of the trip; seeing this familiar place through my children’s eyes.

The ride kept stopping for some reason and whenever it did, Claudia would say, “Let’s go again!”

Tune in next time to see whether we truly make bad parenting decisions. :: Spoiler Alert:: we totally do.

 

[erinch]

Following! You are a wonderful writer!

 

[MikeWsGirl]

Following! You are a wonderful writer!

Mom! I told you not to comment on my trip report!

I’m kidding. Thank you for the compliment. I’m trying? Also thank you for following along, life got a little busy but I should have some time tomorrow.

 

[OurLuce]

Loving your report. We didn't attempt disney till the 'baby' was 9. And we still had over tired meltdowns from the then 11 year old. Hope they love disney as much as mine do.

 

[MikeWsGirl]

Loving your report. We didn't attempt disney till the 'baby' was 9. And we still had over tired meltdowns from the then 11 year old. Hope they love disney as much as mine do.

I read about your commando days, I can understand having meltdowns if the kids are in the park all day. I'm super excited for what our next trip will be like.

 

[MikeWsGirl]

January 31st 2022 – Licking ‘Cheampeen’ and other Questionable Parenting Decisions - Part Two​

I'm alive! And determined to finish this trip report. Thank you to everyone who is following along and thank you for all the comments. I choose to teach part time because I find writing to be super isolating, especially since I started focusing on fiction so it's marvelous to have feedback again.

When I left off, we were on our way out of Magic Kingdom and headed back to Beach Club so Claudia could nap. On our way we saw a cavalcade of Winnie the Pooh characters. Clark was over the moon to see them out in the wild.

Caption: Can you believe the joy and excitement on Clark’s face? Well, I know you can't because I blurred it out, but I think the excitement and open mouth shouting "Hi Piglet" while clapping his kindergartener hands together helps it come across. By contrast, Claudia is melting.

A friend of mine who used to do crowd control during the parades said that watching the children's faces was the best part. Having seen my six year old delight in the characters, I totally understand that. When I was in a parade (I held the rope. I was absurdly proud; I called my Mom and Gran who wree also absurdly proud of me holding the rope at the end of the parade.) I mostly watched Mickey who was in the float ahead of me and focused on waving and dancing. This was back in the era of Mickey's Jammin' Jungle Parade.

Caption: Pictured at bottom - janky stroller aka our trip's beloved guest star.

Five years ago when we went to Disney with an eleven month old Clark, I paid eight dollars and fifty cents for a stroller that was in rough shape, expecting that I wouldn’t use it because I exclusively baby wore. We didn’t use the stroller that trip but Claudia loves our janky umbrella stroller with wheels that don’t roll and a dated patterned canopy seat which is so thin that if you blow on the fabric, it might disintegrate. Our running joke was that someone would steal our stroller and we’d have to thank them.

When Dad picked us up from the airport, he immediately asked if he could buy us a new stroller. The first time he pushed it in the parks, he offered again. The thing is I loved that stroller; no other stroller had blue wheels with red caps, no other stroller had that pattern, no other stroller looked like it had done a tour of duty in Afghanistan and gone back for more. It made our janky stroller really easy to pick out of the lineup of perky, new double strollers.

We stopped quickly at the bathrooms by guest relations. I helped Clark and David helped Claudia. While I was washing my hands, I saw a tall, willowy young woman wearing Chanel flip flops. She looked as expensive as her shoes. While I regularly read all the gossip rags - David gets me a bouquet of trashy maagazines for Valentine's day, Easter and Mother's Day - I'd never be able to spot them in the wild. When we flew through LAX, my mom was the one to spot the Olsen twins.

Ninety percent certain it was a model. More like ninety-five. I walked out of the bathroom feeling frumpier than ever before in my life.

As we were exiting the park, we caught Mickey and his friends leaving to go backstage.


Caption: It’s a good thing there were ropes otherwise Mickey would have been rushed like a quarterback with a lazy defensive line.

By that time, Claudia was done, she needed a nap. We hightailed it towards the exit. Clark finally got his cotton candy. David joked that it was great for insulating gingerbread houses. The same kiosk that sold cotton candy also had popcorn. I remarked that it was a good thing that David didn’t like popcorn because the buckets were refillable. David said that he’d only be interested in a refillable sushi bucket. I gagged at the thought of carrying around a bucket of sushi in the sun. I can’t think of a more efficient way to get food poisoning. I think we’ve found Portage La Prairie’s official food - refillable sushi buckets.

Caption: You can't see it because I blurred it out but Claudia is glaring at the camera because it isn't a bed. Also, I gave David a haircut before the trip. How many of the Disboard partners and wives here have started doing that because of Covid? Our hair stylists opened back up but I got saddled with a permanent job because David likes the convenience of me cutting his hair better. I spent ages on this cut because I knew I'd see any mistakes I made in the pictures and agonize over them.

David took Clark for lunch and to the pool while Claudia napped. Then I took Claudia to the pool while Clark had a lie down because we had made the questionable parenting choice to go to Evening Extra Magic Hours with a two year old and a six year old that had already spent half a day in the parks.

We walked the short distance to Epcot’s International Gateway from our hotel. As soon as we got through the gates, David booked a Disability pass for the new ride in France, then David took the kids to Sunshine Seasons in the Land for something to eat. I stayed back and sampled the offerings at the Canadian Pavilion; beet carpaccio and truffle risotto. I had read about the dish on a blog before we arrived and my dinner lived up to its rave reviews.


Caption: But for the neon green shirts, with our printer paper tone skin, Clark and I kind of blend in.

We were there during the Festival of the Arts and I would have loved to participate in all of the events but most of them were held outside during the day so it would have killed my skin to attend. I was sad because I love art but my kids aren't really at an age where they would appreciate it. Also modern art is my favourite and while David does put up with going to art galleriees, invariably he'll come up behind me while I'm appreciating a painting and ask whether I see the faces in the coffee grounds. So no FArts us.

David got the kids an award winning dinner of lemon chiffon cake, chocolate cake and cheesecake to share. Claudia wasn’t interested in any of those so she got an M&M cookie.

Claudia ate very little throughout the trip. The whole thing was so over stimulating and overwhelming that she prioritised sleep over food. Even if she’d barely eaten in the morning, when we got back to the room, there wasn’t anything I could do to convince her to try a banana – she just wanted her pacifier and a nap. She also was hesitant about trying new foods so even familiar things like chicken strips were rejected because they didn’t look like the chicken strips at home.

Caption: In front of the Rataouille fountain. I think Claudia is smiling because we told her she could have her pacifier when she gets home.

The one winner of the trip was Gogurt. I’d wager that Claudia ate ninety percent of the Gogurt tubes we bought. Clark wasn’t interested in them and had figured out that only Mommy made him eat his snack bag before he got sweets so he regularly filled up on junk and would gallantly hand his Gogurt to his sister saying, “Here Claudia, you can have it,” as though offering up the last bite of a prized snack.

Caption: It is long past bedtime but this little boy is masked up, vaxxed up, has his 3D glasses up and is ready to GO!

After that we went on Living with the Land which claimed that there was a ten minute wait. It took all of thirty seconds to walk the line up before we were climbing into the boats. I had packed multiple pairs of shoes for the kids because I was terrified of them getting blisters.

As David carried Claudia through the lineup, he joked that she would have blisters on her bum.

Claudia found the parks overwhelming so she refused to get out of the stroller. On the rare occasions where she did have to come out of the stroller to walk through a line up, she insisted on being carried. I understood her feelings; there were twenty times more people in the park than the population of Swan River and the idea of getting lost was terrifying. It was also super noisy and chaotic. I’d want to be held too.

The kids enjoyed looking at the plants on Living with the Land and identifying the different vegetables. Clark asked all their names. He kept asking if the animatronics were real. Then Clark had me repeat the word animatronics until he could say it. During the following days he would ask if the figures on the rides were animatronics. It really brought home to me how close make believe and reality were for him on this trip.

Continued in next post!

 

[MikeWsGirl]

January 31st 2022 – Licking ‘Cheampeen’ and other Questionable Parenting Decisions - Part Three​

Caption: Claudia struggled to keep the 3D glasses on her tiny baby face during the rides.

Then it was time for Ratatouille. My painful skin was hard to deal with but my sore muscles were worse. I wonder how out of shape moms take their kids to Disney. They probably don’t run with their six year olds on their backs. After a day of walking, Clark was tired so I piggybacked him all the way to the French Pavilion. We figured out the best position for him to be in on my back so he was close to me without choking me. Whenever I’d tell him to move himself up or closer, Clark would oblige. He was a really good listener on the trip.

We had to wear 3-D glasses on the Rataouille ride and Claudia found the characters jumping right in her face to be too much and started to cry. She was fine once David removed her glasses. By contrast, Clark loved the ride and declared that it was his favourite of the day.

At one point the rats spray champagne on the ride cars. Clark wiped his head and went to lick it. I jokingly warned him it was alcohol and Clark knows not to drink that so he dropped his hand. Afterwards he kept telling everyone how he got sprayed with ‘cheampeen’.


Caption: Woo hoo! Riding the Mexican boat ride twice in a row. Clark looks excited, Claudia looks exhausted.


From there we walked to Mexico. The nighttime show ‘Harmonious’ started as we were entering the building. The speakers were crazy loud and our overtired kids covered their ears. Inside, the Mexican Pavilion was a ghost town. It was us and three cast members. We rode the boat ride and it was so empty that we got to stay on and ride it twice. From then on, if the kids liked a ride, they asked if they could stay on. Clark liked that Donald had a whole bunch of sombreros stacked on his head.

From there we headed to the Norwegian Pavilion. Extra Magic Hours had started and there was an exodus of people so we felt like salmon swimming upstream. Clark stayed close so as not to get lost.
Caption: Claudia clinging to David like a tiny koala baby, she considered him her other means of transportation on the trip; Daddy aka the less janky stroller.

We got a bit of pixie dust when Clark declared in the middle of the line that he had to pee. John, the saintly cast member, gave us permission to leave the line and join it right where we were when we got back. It was so nice. I’d never seen the Frozen queue which was very well themed. I pointed out all the details in the beautiful Frozen bathrooms too. The kids liked thumping on the big barrels in the queue. We also got to see Oaken in the sauna window which was fun.

I got to recreate the ride picture from five years ago when we went down the steep drop and I felt like I was going to drop baby Clark.



In the next picture, I’m wearing an identical expression while holding Claudia and wishing that I had a better grip on her.

Caption: David saw this photo and said, "You couldn't have had a better grip on her."
To which I replied, "Sir, your faith in my spindly, pipecleaner arms is misplaced. Also our toddler weighs fifty percent more than a baby."


Right before the drop, a monster comes out of the snow. Claudia got scared so I reassured her, not realising there was a drop immediately after. At the bottom we got splashed and Claudia announced that she didn’t like the Frozen ride because a monster scared her, then she got splashed.

After that it was ten thirty so we called it a night. I was so so so so sore from walking all over the planet and piggybacking Clark and running while piggybacking Clark.

Before crawling into bed, I washed the kids’ snack bags and refilled them. Clark wore a fanny pack so in theory he could reach into his snack bag at any time. What actually happened was the fruits and vegetables got ignored until I saw Clark chowing down on cotton candy or a Dole whip and asked him about his snack bag. Then Claudia would see Clark’s Gogurt and having eaten hers already would demolish his too.

The other thing that I put in my fanny pack and Clark’s fanny pack were fidgets. Being a teacher, I have a comprehensive collection. I switched them out every two days or so. In the rare times when we ended up in a line, I would pull them out and it worked well.

Woo hoo! Day one of the trip down! Only thirteen more to go!

 

[MikeWsGirl]

February 1st 2022 – Mr. Cool Half Mill​

This day we got our entry down to a science. While Daddy waited in line for coffee, I took the kids to the Hunny Pots. Then we brought the coffees to Dumbo where there is an indoor playground in the line and the kids played while we sipped. It was all going well until Clark approached us with a panicked expression, “I have to poop!”


Caption: A vampire riding a flying elephant. What’s more unlikely?

Luckily the place was designed for kids so after telling a cast member the situation, David and Clark slipped out the backdoor. Claudia climbed up and down the same steps over and over again. It was all new and there were lots of parts of the playground which were interactive and made noises so it took a lot of courage to try and cross the netting. I knew she would have done it if Clark had been there to do it first and encourage her to cross the ropes. She liked pulling the strings at one play station to set off ‘fireworks’. David and Clark slipped in the back door again then we met up with Dad and Jen.


Caption: I like how you can see the castle in the background here. I'm a fan of pink but I feel like it makes the WDW version less unique.


Caption: Despite carrying a toddler around for most of the previous day, David was happy and full of energy. He enjoyed the trip more than I thought he would. I think he underestimated how magical it would be to see the parks through the kids eyes.

Dad had called me that morning, “I want you to know that I have the orange peels.” I had thought that the height limit for Seven Dwarves Mine Train was thirty-six inches. Claudia is thirty-five and seven eighths of an inch tall if she stands up very straight but I had seen a video on Instagram of a family who snuck orange peels into the heels of their toddler’s shoes who was just a little short.


Dad and David went off to doctor Claudia’s shoes out of sight of the cast members then we all got into line. Unfortunately, Claudia was done. She wanted a nap. And for some bizarre reason, her parents had stuck orange peels in her shoes so Claudia had no interest in this roller coaster. When we got to the front of the line, I discovered the height requirement was thirty-eight inches. Claudia might have made it if we had stuffed her shoes with giant, gross navel orange rinds and she stood up straight. As it was, the orange peels were thin and Claudia drooped like a limp, miserable noodle.

Caption: Claudia in a good mood goofing around on the balcony. Aka looking nothing like the little girl who stood next to the height measurement.

The cast members were having none of it, “She’s too little.” And with that, Claudia and I were out of line, I took off her shoes and popped the peels into the garbage. We arranged a rider swap and to meet in front of Winnie the Pooh. Clark was happy – he got to ride again.


Caption: Although Clark looks like someone is stabbing him in his little kindergartener leg, he's having fun. To quote Tommy Jones, “This is my happy face.”

While Clark and I rode Seven Dwarves, David found his first true Disney love – a turkey leg.

Caption: Maybe we should give them some privacy?


My true Disney love used to be cupcakes. It might be jalapeno pretzels now. Clark loved cotton candy and Claudia consistently ate popcorn. I don’t know if she loved popcorn though. There are a number of families that I follow on the Disboards whose toddlers HATE Disney with a passion – they just want a nap and the pool. I don’t think Claudia hated anything but she didn’t love any of the food. The only thing she ate with gusto was buttered bread that Jen bought from Walmart. The rest of the time it was like she was on a hunger strike. She did eat part of David’s turkey leg that day though.

My skin was hurting so we needed to get somewhere dark. David booked a Disability pass for Pirates that came up virtually as soon as we got there. Walking the line in the dark caverns was a balm on my fiery skin. At the drop, David said, “Whoa,” and I clutched Claudia closer to me. We had placed her in the middle of the boat so she wouldn’t get wet.

Grandpa Jim of course insisted on buying the kids something from the gift shop. Clark chose a tricorn pirate hat. Grandpa Jim chose Minnie Mouse sunglasses for Claudia because the only thing she was interested in at that point was a nap. Then Grandpa Jim gave us a ride back to the hotel.

Dad had ordered a white noise machine to make naps easier. We turned it on and then all of us had a monster nap. Three hours later, I was the first one to wake up and slowly went around the room, tidying while everyone else slept.

At five fifteen, I woke up David. At five twenty we woke up the kids and Dad and Jen arrived shortly after to watch them.

At some point in the afternoon, Claudia told David the following story.

“Daddy washed my hands, then dried my hands, then he put orange peels in my shoes. Then Mommy took them out and said, “Grody!”

David listened to all of this and thought, “You forgot the part where you were a turkey and refused to stand up straight.”

David and I took the Skyliner to Hollywood Studios and ate at Tap House.

Caption: Us enjoying the Skyliner and me hoping it won't stop because I read Tom Bricker's blog about the firemen not taking the skyliner because they are so understaffed. We got our own car and it was some quiet, alone time that was very much appreciated.

The shirt I'm wearing says, "My thoughts create my world." It's a quote from a Megan McCafferty book.


I wanted to eat at the Brown Derby two nights in a row but no dice. I’d have to wait until our reservation the next night. There were two men and a boy sitting at the other end of a long table in the restaurant. I asked to join them and they graciously obliged.

Then the older man proceeded to talk about dues at a club that he was a member of and the politics of it. He discussed the other members and their jobs, referencing that one was probably making half a million. The nonchalant way that this rolled off his tongue floored me. Because we live in a remote area where a large percentage of people are impoverished, I’m very aware of my privilege and the fact that most people cannot have our lifestyle. If that conversation was a person, it would have been a tanned man wearing a diamond encrusted watch, sitting in his Porsche spyder talking about his ten vacation homes.

We had everything on the menu at Tap House; the interestingly spiced almonds, the pretzel with mustard dip, the charcuterie board and the weird steak puff thing. The food was good but man alive was I excited for our fancy dinner the next night. The most memorable item we consumed was the hibiscus soda.

There are no pictures of the food because I’m not that kind of person. Also I don’t have a smart phone.

Weird. I know.

As the trip wore on, David and I got a little more tired each date night. This was our first one so we were bright eyed and bushy tailed, holding hands, I journaled furiously while waiting for food – I wanted to remember all of it. Even Mr. Cool Half-Mill.

Vacations can either pull a couple apart or push them together. Even with the stress of dealing with my skin in a place that was not at all accommodating – Disney was accommodating but Florida neglected to turn off their sun – David and I were elated to be together, on a trip with our children, having fun.

After dinner, David and I went on Midway Mania. He beat me. That’s what I get for not spending all of my spare time growing up playing video games. Then we went to Galaxy’s Edge.

Disclaimer. I am the lone Torontonian who moved to the frigid middle of nowhere and am happier for it. I love open fields, trees, the way everything looks like a painting. Cities are not my thing.

I hated Galaxy’s Edge. The Imagineers got it spot on – it’s a dirty, sandy city in the middle of Disney World. I am over cities. The only thing worse was the filthy, dangerous parking garage that was Smuggler’s Run.

Caption: Me standing with the only cool thing I saw in Galaxy’s Edge. I have no clue why the internet lost its mind over this place.





David saw this photo and asked where it was from, "Galaxy's Edge."

"There were trees in Galaxy's Edge?" Clearly he also remembers it as being a dirty, sandy city with few redeeming features. We very much appreciate the ability to walk five hundred meters in any direction and have wild open prairie. Although I will say that nothing beats the view we had when we lived in Prince Albert, Saskatchewan and could walk down our street and see the bush in the distance. Fun fact, TDR Explorer is from Prince Albert.


Caption: Me questioning the life choices which led me to stand in this wretched place while on vacation.



We went on Smuggler’s Run once. According to David, unless I develop some video game skills, once is enough. I make a terrible gunner and the ride depends on everyone being good at video games. Needless to say, our team did not succeed.

While we were away, Dad took Clark in the little pool behind the ship and Clark went down the slide over and over again. Claudia was refurbished from her nap but being a Covid baby, she’s pretty cautious so she hung out in the shallow end with Jen.

When we came back, the kids were sitting up in bed and the grandparents were lying down, completely tired out. They left and we put the kids to sleep.

​

 

[MikeWsGirl]

Wednesday February 2nd, 2022 – Do we get your Lightning Lane? Part One​

Despite their late bedtime, we got up sooooo early that we decided to go straight to the parks for Extra Magic Hours. Tragically the buses had other ideas and the arrival time kept being moved back. This was the only time that the buses let us down during the trip.

We booked Genie+ for my Dad, Jen and Clark that day because David and I were going to leave early so I’d be ok for our date that night.

David went to get coffee while the kids and I waited in the standby line for Peter Pan. This was a terrible idea. We waited an hour. The kids were so done by the end. Clark kept asking why he had to wait. This kid, he doesn’t understand that Disney is about waiting in line. Not standing under an awning eating in the darkest corner your mom can find, then going on a ride immediately after.

By the end of the trip, either from touring without me, or after seeing me sick or hearing that we need to get somewhere dark fast, Clark made the connection that he didn’t wait when touring with me. He’d turn to me while walking to an attraction and say, “Do we get your Lightning Lane?”

The kids had fun spotting Tinkerbell in Wendy’s room but it was not worth the hour long wait to get to the interactive queue part. Also, some of the effects that I remembered, like the bells, weren’t working. You used to be able to reach up and ring the shadow bells on the wall. There was just a sad empty space there now.

When we got out of line David was super relieved to see us. Because I didn’t have a cell phone, it was imperative that we show up at our agreed upon locations. That said, sometimes my skin made me feel so unwell that I’d have to find cover and not be able to get to our meet up location. I think David was freaking out. Although he said that he saw a hot tour guide while he was on a bench watching for us. I was surprised by the number of VIP tour guides that I saw during our trip but I guess paid fastpass tips the scales in terms of hiring one.

Then we went on It’s a Small World, Claudia really loved Small World and was bopping along to the music and singing in her little voice. It was adorable. That ride was exactly Claudia’s speed. She liked all the animal dolls.



Caption: Riding It’s a Small World. If you’ll notice Clark insisted on wearing his tricorn hat that day.


Caption: Claudia liked the tiger.

I loved the expression of wonder and fascination on her little face.

I was glad because Small World is in my top three rides with Splash taking the number one spot.

Afterwards we used the Tangled bathrooms. I was the only one who was properly excited for these themed washrooms.

Claudia lost her mind because she didn’t want to go to the potty with Daddy. When Clark and I exited the bathrooms, I heard someone’s kid screaming bloody murder. Generally this trip, it was someone else’s child and I got to smile down in relief at my two angels. But my good luck had run out and it was my child who was red faced and coated in tears and snot. “Not Daddy,” she sobbed. “Not Daddy.” I let Claudia collapse onto my shoulder as I walked to find the stroller and gave David a moment to gather himself. Claudia weighs thirty pounds so normally I don’t carry her while walking but she was so distraught that I made an exception.

Clark and David went on Seven Dwarves Mine Train and Clark came off grinning and declared it was ‘an every day ride.’ Claudia was complaining of a headache after her tantrum so I took her to First Aid station in the hopes of finding Tylenol and a pacifier. She would be three in a week but you do what you have to in order to get your toddler through a Disney trip. They didn’t have pacifiers but we did get a Tylenol from the nurse.

Caption: Clark on his ‘every day’ ride.

David and Clark went on the Barnstormer while we were gone. This is a ride that I could only take Clark on in the evening. The queue is open and the coaster is placed directly under the sun, the only worse attraction would be the Speedway for me. David was expecting the ride to get scary and then it was over. It’s a short coaster.

Then David and Clark went and played in the Dumbo playground waiting for us to return from the Babycare centre. Claudia and I got in line just as Clark and David were passing in the other direction to get onto Dumbo. I passed Claudia over the barrier and got out of line. My skin was feeling terrible by that point and I was feeling sick from being so exposed (through two or three layers of clothing). But Dad and Jen appeared just as David got on the ride with the kids so I took photos of them riding in their elephant.


Caption: There’s a toddler baby in there, you just can’t see her. You’ll just have to suspend some more belief that you’re already suspending to believe in these flying elephants.

I apologised to my Dad for booking him a Genie+ for the Speedway but it was something Clark really wanted to do that I wouldn’t be able to take him on. All the people look like they’re driving on the surface of the sun – there isn’t a speck of shade on that course as far as I can see.

We popped Claudia in the stroller and went to get David his love – another turkey leg. I made us stop so photopass could get a couple of photos of David with his beloved.

The photos turned out so well that I got the idea for David to get a turkey leg and for me to hold it and him to go on one knee and pretend to propose . . . to the turkey leg. And my horrified offended expression. We didn’t end up doing this. Maybe next trip.


Caption: I like David’s expression here. It says, “Do you mind? We’re having a moment.”

Also Photopass was as bemused as you think while I stood there giving David artistic direction with his turkey leg.

Unlike yesterday when Claudia couldn’t get enough of the turkey leg, she would have nothing to do with it today. David made sure that Claudia and I got back to the resort because I was feeling iffy then he took the bus to ‘Lego’ Springs. It’s actually Disney Springs but David kept calling the shopping park that name so it stuck.


Caption: Photo of Lego Springs. Wait, no, that’s Legoland.

Claudia had another giant nap and David returned with just fifteen minutes to spare before Paula from Kid’s Nite Out arrived. I was very happy with this service and ended up booking an additional night with them on top of the three we had booked. I found the sitters from Kid’s Nite Out to be professional, friendly and prepared.

Clark was still living his best life with Grandpa Jim and Jen. They rode Big Thunder Mountain and saw the Country Bear Jamboree before going back to their rental house for a swim. Dad congratulated me on my forward thinking of including a spare outfit for Clark when he jumped in with his clothes on. Clark enjoyed playing with their dog Riley. Clark also managed to find Bear, my Dad’s notoriously shy cat that they had brought with them from home. In all of the pictures, Clark is grinning ear to ear, delighted to be getting his own big boy day with Grandpa Jim.


Caption: Please note the bubble wand on the deck, that will come up later.

While Claudia could be pushed to enjoy Disney, she would have been happy to go back to the resort, hang out at the pool and play with her dolls the whole time. By contrast, Clark was the perfect age, young enough that the magic was very real but old enough to keep up with the pace of touring.

Grandpa Jim and Jen had such a good time that they ended up keeping Clark until after six before bringing him back which meant that Paula had to hang out in the room with Claudia for ages before taking the kids to get dinner. The two kids was a lot for Dad and Jen but one big kid who can dress and toilet himself and can articulate exactly what he needs seemed much easier.

Coming up, dinner at the Brown Derby. Will we encounter equally wealthy people at the fancy pants restaurant as Mr. Cool Half Mill at Tap House the night before? Stay tuned and thank you for reading.

 

[MikeWsGirl]

Wednesday February 2nd, 2022 – Do we get your Lightning Lane? Part Two​

While Claudia went on a hunger strike during the trip, there were days where Clark would go without lunch because he’d get passed from one person to another at a weird time and I would only connect the dots after dinnertime had come and gone that he hadn’t eaten in twelve hours.Then Clark would wolf down whatever I placed in front of him. I feel like this was one of those days.

Caption: Clark is excited because we remembered to feed him. At T-Rex! Also the lighting is so weird in T-Rex, I didn't even need to blur the photo. This occurred on our last day of the trip. Every other time, we fed the kids on the fly or not at all. This confirms my theory that only shirty parents go to Disney or maybe everyone becomes terrible parents at Disney? All I know is that I do at least.

This laissez faire parenting also explains why Claudia got baths during the trip and Clark didn’t. That’s right, Clark got zero baths in the whole two weeks we were at Disney.

David bathed Claudia super quickly before Paula arrived. She has curly hair that becomes matted if left unchecked for too many days.

David and I had another incredible night out. We started with dinner at the Brown Derby. David had the tuna carpaccio which was phenomenal. I had the pork belly and scallops. David shared part of his filet with me. I finally got to taste the grapefruit cake which was spectacular.

We went to Toy Story Land because I refused to wait in a dirty parking garage. We rode Alien Swirling Saucers together and Midway Mania as well as Slinky Dog. It was a really enjoyable, laidback evening. We ended up walking back because we felt it was faster than the Skyliner.

 

[MikeWsGirl]

Thursday February 3rd, 2022 – A Conveyor Belt of Carbs​

Before I opened my eyes, my face was swollen. My cheeks and lips were painful to the touch even in the dark. I knew that our original plan of Animal Kingdom, a notoriously sunny park, would spell the end for me. I’d told Dad that my face was hurting the night before so he knew not to expect me in the parks in the morning.

I got up early to try and book the good Genie+ rides. There was a long line at guest services of people who had been trying to use the app and failed. Rather than joining the line, I kept running all around the resort searching for a good internet hot spot. I booked Rise of the Resistance for Dad, David and Clark. I also booked Slinky Dog on Genie+ for them but it was super late. So late that I could have rode with them.

David took the kids in the pool while I stayed and did yoga in the room with the curtains half closed and my back to the window, trying to save all my lumens ( unit of measurement for light) for the park. Finally I went down to meet them.

The three of them were sitting on the sandbar together. “Claudia, tell Mommy what you did,” David prompted. “She ate sand!” squealed Clark, unable to hold in the secret. My children put weird things in their mouths. This was a theme on the trip a little. Claudia was lucky that David was there – he’s better at cleaning both objects and people than I am. Claudia would still have sand between her molars had I been the parent on deck.

I made Claudia go down the little slide once. She was not happy about it. She was scared both by the slide and the water getting in her face at the end.

Then I went in the lazy river with Clark. I was covered head to knee in UV clothes and since my calves have seen zero sun since 2019, they didn’t shout about it. The experience was so fun. There are times where I’m struck by how grown up my little boy is becoming, this was one of them. Despite not having swimming lessons since the start of the pandemic – our local pool was closed for renovations – he showed a lot of water safety awareness and stuck by the edge of the lazy river.

The lazy river was crazy deep. Like ten feet deep! Who makes a deep lazy river? What is wrong with you Michael Eisner? If you drown all the tourists they can’t spend more money on your business. But seriously, you looked down and realized how deep it was. The lifeguards all stood there, warning everyone who waded to the bottom of the steps – careful, there’s a drop off!

Caption: Where Michael Eisner sacrifices tourists to the gods of consumerism.

Clark sat on a floating chair with me then decided that he would try to get in a tube himself. It was tricky and he fell in while wearing a life jacket. I fished him out and he rode on my lap again. Once Clark built up some courage and we managed to get him onto his own floating chair. For a minute he even decided he wanted to float separate from me before crying, “Come get me!” and I paddled back over to him and hooked my leg onto his floatie.

It’s rare now that I get alone time with Clark. It’s funny how having just one kid feels sooooo easy. It also feels special because I get to really connect with that child. With Clark starting school, a lot of the time, I feel like I don’t see him. He’ll run into my classroom for a hug before and after recess, but the rest of the day, he’s in his own classroom. I really loved the times when I got to float around the lazy river with Clark and appreciate how wonderful and grown up he is.

While we were swimming, David and Claudia walked to the Boardwalk Bakery on what was a baby training walk. While I had trained Clark to walk across town, Claudia’s training walks consisted of her walking three blocks without crying from snow, cold or difficulty. I had varying success with this.

Caption: Lunch! Spoiler alert, it’s cake. Again.



But David not only convinced Claudia to walk to the bakery, he also got her to walk back by handing her the Key Lime pie she had picked out for me. “Hold this carefully for Mommy,” David said, handing Claudia the dessert at the bakery. Claudia held the pie tightly and upright in her hands the whole almost kilometer back to the room, but when Clark and I opened the door to the hotel room, she rushed at me almost upending the dessert in her enthusiasm. “Mommy! This is for you!”

David and Clark had pineapple celebration cake after having Mickey waffles for breakfast. Cake for lunch – Shhh! Don’t tell Mom. As Mom is sitting right there questioning what kind of parent she is while her children mow down on a conveyor belt of carbs.

Then David and Clark took off to make their Rise of the Resistance fastpass with Grandpa Jim. I was a little worried about how Clark would do on Rise of the Resistance because the cast members there belong to the First Order and don’t break character so I’ve heard stories of little kids crying. I had explained to Clark that he could trust anyone with the cast member badge and ask them for help and they would be kind, except for the First Order ones. The room full of Storm Troopers looks menacing even in photos so I didn’t know how Clark would feel on the ride. But according to David and my Dad, he loved it.

Caption: You can't see it but it looks like my Dad is viciously pinching Clark's side. My Dad isn't obviously, what with being a good grandpa but all the same Clark looks miserable. That’s his photo-taking face. The other 99.9% of the vacation when there wasn’t a camera on him, he was grinning ear to ear.

Claudia and I hung around the room while Claudia napped and I willed my skin to feel less sensitive. After Rise of the Resistance, the boys took in the Indiana Jones Spectacular. Clark paid attention and quoted the show afterwards telling me that Indy never loses his hat. It was neat details like that which brought home how much my little boy was taking from this experience.

Grandpa Jim bought Clark a remote control RC Car and a shoulder Woody to ride on him. But took them back to his rental house for safe keeping when he went to get Jen. This was the only time on the trip where Clark lost his mind. Claudia and I started walking over to the Studios. I realized I couldn’t log into my Gmail account since Google enacted the double sign in measures on unfamiliar devices and my phone didn’t work so I made a long distance call to David from the room telling him we’d be there soon.

Caption: This was the best one out of eight. Please take my assurance that Clark is making a bizarre face in this one.


I knew the call would be expensive even though we talked for less than a minute but I had no idea how expensive. Twenty dollars! American! Twenty-six dollars Canadian! I told David afterward that for that price he should have said everything he wanted to do to me or some other such X-rated talk.

David and Clark did Swirling Saucers because Clark was losing his mind from waiting for Claudia and me and not having his toy.

Caption: David is having the time of his life with a depressed orphan.


David booked a Disability pass for Mickey and Minnie’s Runaway Railway. Then I took Clark on Star Tours while David and Claudia went to see Muppet Vision 3D.

We got my favourite seat on the ride- back row, far corner. I can’t touch the ground there so I got thrown around. Clark is nowhere close to touching the ground and even though the seatbelt tightened, he really got jostled. Clark was taken with C3PO and wanted to know what R2D2 was doing that was going to get them deactivated. It was funny the way Clark would pull out tidbits from rides days after riding something. Slinky Dog Dash was his favourite but truly Clark enjoyed every ride and paid such close attention.

Muppets proved to be too intense for Claudia. She didn’t enjoy things jumping right into her face. Despite the Muppets’ claims to the contrary, they used gimmicks and gratuitously tossed 3D objects at people but once David removed Claudia’s glasses, she had a better time.

Then we did Mickey and Minnie’s Runaway Railroad. Both kids melted down in the line after the preshow so that David and I each carried a child onto the ride. My Dad thought the effect of walking through the screen was really cool. It was a minor meltdown because the kids quickly recovered and enjoyed the ride.

All of us agreed that Mickey and Minnie was super strange. I filed it under the ‘Don’t Need to Ride Again’ category. I found the storyline disjointed and both David and I agreed that it reminded us of the ‘Itchy and Scratchy’ cartoons that used to be featured on the Simpsons but less violent. Those sections of the Simpsons were so gory that it would turn my stomach watching them. I remember dreading seeing those characters pop up on the screen.

Caption: The ride stopped in the Daisy ballet lesson so we got a good on ride photo.

From there, the people with Genie+ ; David, Clark, Dad and Jen, had some time before the Midway Mania fastpass so I suggested we ride Alien Swirling Saucers. It posted a thirty minute wait but I knew it wouldn’t be that long. Dad likes waiting even less than Clark and as soon as he realised we were in the standby line, decided to leave.

Claudia and I stayed and I fed her grapes in line while she played coy and hid behind my legs before staring at the people in front and behind us, enchanting everyone in the line. The ride was perfectly at her level, I made sure to hold onto Claudia tightly. The previous night when the seatbelt had been tightened to David, I got tossed about. I didn’t want my little girl having that experience.

Everyone else went on Midway Mania. Clark, who loves video games more than anything else in the world, adored it and scored 42,000 in his first game. David scored 142,000.

Caption: I love the intense focus; no one gets between Clark and his video games.

Next up, it was Slinky Dog, the ride that they had been waiting the whole day to ride. Normally as a parent, David goes with the flow, if the kids don’t want to do something he’s fine with it. So when Clark said that he was scared to ride and David got upset, I was kind of surprised. The only ride I was willing to force Clark on was Splash Mountain which was closed. I tried to tell Clark that he didn’t have to ride – Grandpa Jim would ride twice. But David would not let Clark back out of doing Slinky Dog Dash.


Caption: Daddy is all smiles but that arm says it all, “Not letting you get away kid, you MUST ride.”

I could understand why Clark was intimidated- Slinky Dog arcs up over the Toy Story Land pathways so you can hear the rider’s cheers and screams as they go past. Despite being a kiddie coaster, Slinky Dog seems like it’s very high in the air because you can physically see it. Claudia and I watched the four of them go into the queue and by the time they’d gotten to the front of the line, Clark had psyched himself up.

I promised Clark a bubble wand if he rode not realising that Grandpa Jim had already purchased both kids a bubble wand. But Clark walked out of the ride raving about it, he said it was fun but it made his tummy feel funny.

Caption: That is one uncertain face, the next ride photo is all joy.

While the four of them rode, I realised Claudia hadn’t had any dinner. First I stopped to buy bananas and got sticker shock when it was nine dollars for two. I referenced Arrested Development to the guy working the till, “How much can a banana cost Michael? Twenty dollars?” The guy wasn’t familiar with Arrested Development but he laughed and said, “In Disney, yes.” It made me feel smug about the amount of fresh produce I had ordered for the room and the sticker shock I had been avoiding all week when the kids ate out of their snack bags.

I got the kids dinner from Woody’s lunchbox. Claudia ate maybe three tater tots and declined the grilled cheese sandwich that my Dad happily ate. Clark inhaled his turkey club so fast that I realized he hadn’t eaten all day (again). Oh well, score one more for theme parks. Clark mowed down the tater tots and rode in the stroller because Claudia was DONE. She was screaming and crying and insisting on being held only by me. I walked while holding her for as long as I could before giving her the choice of walking by herself or being carried by Daddy. She chose Daddy who went back to being called ‘Dada’ this trip.

Clark was delighted to be riding in the stroller. On our training walks we had our big Bob stroller so Clark could sit on the front and give his feet a break. I had hoped that Claudia would walk more this trip but the only time she left the stroller was to melt over David’s shoulder. I was relieved that Clark was off his feet, I was worried that walking twenty thousand steps a day would harm his growth. David assured me it wouldn’t. One of us has a medical degree but one of us is a Mom so there’s a fifty percent chance that I’m right.

Grandpa Jim drove us back to the hotel and Clark conked out in his car seat. He only woke up when we put him on the potty in the room. Even though he had been completely out of it, he sat straight up and said, “I need to play with RC!”

Because I’m clinically insane, I decided to take Claudia across to the Screendoor shop half a kilometer away at the Boardwalk so she could pick out a toy. The previous night on our date, I’d seen a great selection of doll sets. Joke was on me though because Claudia picked a set that was available steps away at the Beach Club Marketplace.

Clark was still playing with RC and Woody when we came back to the room. Even though it had been the world’s longest day and both the kids were hours past exhausted, I still read with them and made Clark do his home reading because I’m a crazy person and the home reading teacher at his school. It ended up being a beautiful, quiet moment, holding my babies in bed after a long day. It showed me both the power of cuddles and routine, in a sea of new, over stimulating experiences, reading together before bed was our special activity. It was so unexpected that I can still recall the softness of the moment now.

The kids fell asleep as soon as their heads hit the pillows. David and I laid next to each other in bed and I whispered, “Have you ever been this tired in your life?”

“Yes, five years ago. The last time we were at Disney.”

Then David gave me a foot massage which is to say he really and truly loves me because after spending my twenties running marathons my feet look like Shrek’s.

I tried on my running shoes shortly before we left for Florida and found there was less than zero tread left on them- I slipped everywhere. So that was how my three hundred dollar orthotics ended up in twenty dollar Joe Fresh shoes. I thought for sure I was going to lose a toenail this trip from all the walking.

Caption: Date night!

 

[MikeWsGirl]

Real life update. If you're Canadian, you might have heard about all the flooding in Manitoba. The road north washed out last week. The footage of where the road used to be looks terrifying. I tried to drive to the neartest southern community (two hours away) only to find that the road south was washed out too. Now I'm back home, waiting for our electric car to charge back up )we don't have a fast charger in town) in the hopes that the other remaining road out of town isn't washed out too.

Maybe I'll make it to Winnipeg tonight? At any rate, I thought I'd use this time to create another post. Thank you to everyone who is following along. There will be a photo of baby Clark in this post!

Friday February 4th, 2022 - Sweaty, Secondhand Caramel Corn​

Out of all of us, David was the most exhausted the next morning so I hustled the kids to the drawing room to play while he slept in. We brought RC, Woody and Claudia’s new doll set as well as Clark’s JUMP math book. It stands for Junior Undiscovered Math Prodigies and is my favourite math curriculum that I’ve ever worked with. JUMP math was designed by an accountant. Clark did twenty pages of JUMP math and was super unimpressed with me because of it. Claudia sat with her dolls and then they played a game where Clark had his car chase Claudia. She shrieked with laughter and both of them had a blast.

Two hours later David came down to find us and took the kids to the Marketplace for Mickey waffles and then they hung out on the beach. Claudia love love loves swings of any kind so the bench swings were her favourite thing ever. Claudia liked them so much she told David that we have to buy one for home.

Caption: The view from the beach swing.

If we go to a park, Claudia has to try all the swings. She's been known to spend over an hour just going back and forth. I remember picking Claudia up from daycare and seeing her in the swing, her worker said, "I've been standing here for forty-five minutes." I thought to myself, "Only that long?"

Caption: I couldn't have gone out during the day to swing with Claudia, but I should have gone at night, I love the view anywhere on Crescent Lake. Next time I guess.


Caption: I have a secret impossible dream that I could get married at that pavillion. The noon sun would reflect off the water and the Beach Club and Yacht Club would be across the lake looking regal elegant just like me in my sleeveless dress. I always loved it when I saw brides there.


Afterwards Dad and Jen came to our room and we walked to EPCOT together. It was unbearably sunny that day and I got a wicked burn on my arms through my UV shirt just from walking over. I had to sprint to Nemo from the International Gateway because it was so bad. As soon as I rounded the corner into the dark queue, I crouched down letting my skin recoup from being on fire. Dad and Jen hadn’t wanted to run after me and stopped for a sandwich.


Caption: The Imagination Pavillion. We’re going to pretend they didn’t gut the soul of the Figment ride while appreciating this photo. Also obviously my Dad took this photo, I was too busy scrambling for shade.

Once David arrived with the kids we all packed into one clamshell because Claudia still counted as a lap baby. Afterwards David went in search of coffee while I took the kids to see Turtle Talk with Crush. We waited a grand total of ten seconds for the doors to open which was how long it took for the kids to find a spot in front of the fish tank so I had to call them back.

We sat on the far side in the middle which was where I had sat with Baby Clark five years ago when we visited. The kids were enamored with Crush when the turtle asked whether the kids had any questions for him, Clark’s little hand shot up. He was desperate to talk to the beloved reptile and wonder of wonders, Crush picked him! “Little dude in the blue shell with the brown fur. What’s your question little dude?”

“In video games you can do a lot of things,” Clark answered in that confident tone only kindergarteners possess.

Crush looked confused for a second and paused to take in that ‘question’. “Insightful observation,” Crush said finally. The audience laughed and Clark was even more delighted because making people laugh is a good thing. The show ended quickly after that but it was such a high note for our trip given that the kids couldn’t hug the characters.

I purchased popcorn for the kids to eat while David and I drank our coffee. When I tried to put the bag of popcorn away a couple minutes later, Clark objected. He had actually eaten part of his snack bag so there was room in his fanny pack, which was how Clark ended up with handfuls of caramel popcorn in his fanny pack that he snacked on for the rest of the day. But just to reinforce how focused on seeing everything Clark was; at the end of the day, I still emptied popcorn out of his fanny pack. Rides = Better than caramel popcorn. At home Clark wouldn’t have left a single kernel in his bag.


Caption: The living Seas Pavillion, where all the fish are crazy. Especially Nemo’s Dad who looks like he just murdered a fever of stingrays with one fin.

From there we headed to Ratatouille. David had booked a Disability pass for us as soon as we had tapped in at the International Gateway. We split into two groups; I sprinted with Clark next to me all the way to the French pavilion but even still my skin hurt. I ducked into a bathroom for a reprieve. Clark didn’t want to go into the bathroom with me but I didn’t want to leave him.

“You’ll stay right here?”

Clark gave me a look that said, I’m not going in there. “Yes.”

I returned it with a skeptical one of my own. Because he’s been known to shout out of the side of the bike to talk to people. (In addition to our electric car, I ride a Danish cargo trike at home to decrease our carbon foot print. We had to buy a Nihola which is a higher end bike but the only one on the market that can accomodate a youth sized rider. We were limited by how short I am essentially.)

Caption: Me with our cargo trike and toddler Clark, about to ride to date night.

“You won’t talk to anyone?”

“Yes.” Clark looked resolute.

“You promise to wait for me?”

Looking more determined to be grown up than ever. “Yes.”

Feeling a little uncertain but not being able to spend one more second in the sun, I went into the bathroom. When I came out a couple of minutes later, Clark was right where I had left him. He was holding the door open for the ladies in line. He was just on the cusp of feeling awkward using the ladies rooms but not yet old enough to use the bathroom by himself in the crowded men’s rooms. When the ladies saw I was Clark’s Mom, they commented on how well behaved he was.

I have a funny feeling Clark broke the ‘No talking to anyone’ rule. Coming from such a small town where his parents know almost everyone, the concept of a ‘stranger’ is a hard one to get across. Afterward when I relayed this story to David he joked about Clark saying, “Hi Ma’am, if you see any strangers, let me know – I’m not supposed to talk to them.”

Clark definitely talked to everyone.


Caption: I wish it had been cold enough for me to wear this sweater on that day, I don't burn through sweaters.

David was panicking at this point because he’d run with Claudia in the stroller to the entrance of Rataouille and the cast member hadn’t seen anyone covered head to toe. I spotted David frantically scanning the area in front of the fountain.

Clark and Claudia found the rats in the fountain hilarious. We’d pointed the rats out during the Evening Extra Magic Hours but I think both kids were too wiped to appreciate how silly and gross it was to have rodents in a fountain.

When I went to tap in, the cast member Shaina identified me right away and was concerned. “Someone is looking for you.”

David appeared behind me and thanked her. Then Shaina let me wait in a dark corner behind the tapstiles while Dad and Jen caught up to us. We weren’t supposed to wait there so I was grateful for that respite.

Claudia sat between David and me with her 3-D glasses off and Clark rode behind us. Afterwards Clark asked my dad whether he liked the cheampeen. David decided to take Claudia back for a nap and we booked a Disability pass for Soarin’. Dark inside ride, low light, inside queue, inside a pavilion with few windows, my skin doesn’t get any more comfortable than that.

For whatever reason, the line for Soarin’ was so short that it was virtually time to tap in as soon as we walked to the pavilion. Another way of putting it was that it took David and I ages to figure out who was going to take the backpack and for me to put all of my UV gear back on. My favourite moment of the day happened as we were figuring out baby and UV gear. Clark reached into his stash of fanny pack popcorn and offered a handful to Grandpa Jim. For the first time ever in my life, I watched in amusement as my dad declined food.

Clark and I ran to the pavilion and met Dad and Jen there. I piggybacked him partway and we sprinted together the rest of the way.

It was funny, in the preshow, Patrick talks about threading the seat belt through the loop between the legs for little kids but I’d never paid attention to the fact that every seat has one. I checked Clark’s seatbelt after carefully threading it through the loop, then Dad checked Clark’s seatbelt, then I did again, then the cast member did, and then Dad pulled on it again for good measure. I think both of us realized that we were in the highest row and felt nervous about Clark riding. It was the only ride where the cast members made Clark stand next to the height measurement.

Clark loved the ride, he talked about how he thought the whale was going to splash him or the bear was going to get him. It was special. I was so happy that we got to experience it together. The ride and all that darkness had refreshed my skin. I was feeling good and ready to do more rides. We made a Disability pass for Frozen. I figured I’d just sprint across the World Showcase and maybe duck into Mexico if I was feeling poorly.

There was some time before we could tap in so I bolted to the Imagination pavilion while my Dad and Jen strolled leisurely with Clark. Dad had wanted to ride Figment with Clark. My late grandmother loved Figment so even in its pared down, bastardized form, Figment is still special to our family. Clark thought all of it was pretty funny and commented later on in the week about Figment gluing all his furniture to the ceiling.

Caption: Figment watching his upside down TV while sitting upside down and eating upside down popcorn. Aka, the height of kindergarten entertainment.


Caption: This is the only part of the Figment ride that comes close to its previous incarnation. Before the trip, I tried showing my kids a ride video of the former Journey into Imagination but the quality was poor, the video seemed jerky and it lacked all the magic.

Even still, this was my Grandma's favourite ride. I don't know whether she loved Figment and that stayed throughout the ride overhaul or whether she enjoyed the bare bones whimsy of its presence state. Regardless, the ride makes me think of her.



Caption: Playing the games in the exit of Journey into Imagination.

After we got home from the trip and Dad sent Clark a shoulder Figment which uses a magnet to stick to shirts, Clark played a game that Figment was gluing everything in our house to the ceiling. He also really loved the part where Figment makes a stink with a skunk and pretended that Figment stunk up the house. That ride is a shadow of its former self but Figment it still sticks with kids. Clark likes to wander around the house pretending Figment is up to mischief. He’ll affect the incredulous scientist voice while he’s pretending.

 

[MikeWsGirl]

Friday February 4th, 2022 - Sweaty, Secondhand Caramel Corn Part Two​

We played a little in the Imagination exit area afterwards but Dad and Jen had to go let their dog out. While we were figuring out what to do, Vanellope from Wreck It Ralph came out. We talked to her a little and gave her the Canadian candies I had in my fanny pack. We took a couple of pictures. Clark seemed unsure of what to do. It was a little strange because there was a knee high fence dividing the characters and their set from the crowd.


Caption: Vanellope trying to get Clark to pose for the photographer and not her.

“Strike a pose,” I instructed Clark who immediately showed off his best super hero pose for Vanellope with his back to the camera. The Photopass photographer, Vanellope and I all found this hilarious. Clark thought it was his pose so he struck a different one causing more laughter before I finally turned him around. We also gave Vanellope candy.

Then across the room, Joy appeared to start her set so we went to meet her as well. Clark also struck a pose facing Joy. I feel like he was so desperate to impress the characters and meet them, that he just jumped to whatever was asked. I forgot to tell Joy that Clark met her as a baby. I imagine she would have enjoyed hearing that.


Caption: Even through the fence, Joy was as lovely and excitable as you would imagine.



Caption: Baby Clark meeting Joy. She booped her own nose then encouraged Clark to do the same.

In the gift shop, I told Clark that this was his opportunity to choose a gift from Gemma which is the grandparent name for my Mom - she claims that she is 'too young' to be a grandma. Clark received a surprising amount of money from relatives for his birthday to buy souvenirs from Disney. There was no way I was going to let him spend all of it, for starters we’d have to check a second bag to bring that many toys back but in addition to that I felt that focusing on buying that much would take away from the experience. Clark chose a Zurg popper.

Then I got ready to go outside again. I was over confident after all that time inside, it was also approaching three o’clock so I thought I was close to home free and so I stopped at a frozen treat kiosk to see if they had frozen bananas. They didn’t but Clark wanted a Gatorade. I told him I’d get him one but then the line wasn’t moving and although I was feeling better, I could feel my internal sun clock ticking so I told him I’d get him a Gatorade somewhere else.

Then we saw a Photopass photographer taking photos in front of the geodesic dome. Holding Clark’s hand and feeling how magical the whole thing was - wandering around Disney World with my grown up six year old, I wanted to remember that moment and have a picture of him in front of the EPCOT icon. So we stopped. Even though there was a line and no shade anywhere.


Caption: At least the photos came out really fun. This was the closest we got to the geodesic dome the entire trip. Epcot isn't really a kids park and we always went through the Inteernational Gateway.

In front of us, there was a couple, the girl turned to the photographer. “He’s going to lift me up. He’s a strong man, that’s his job.”

And then the line watched as the guy threw this girl over his shoulders like a sack of potatoes. It was hilarious, her bum over his shoulder in front of the big ball. Then she turned around with her elbows on his back looking so funny and adorable. I decided I’d do that with Clark.

Caption: I'm a strong pipecleaner. Like Forky .Even without his elbows propped, he looks cute.

And here is my final mistake.

I stripped off my UV gear to take the photos. I wanted my face and arms out. I didn’t want a reminder of porphyria in my vacation photos if I could help it. I kept on the lone UV acessory that I don't hate - my neckerchief.

Clark and I posed for some truly adorable photos where I mimicked his super hero poses then I threw him over my shoulder and we laughed.

I quickly pulled my sleeves and face covering back on but already I was feeling the effects of the sun. We got about two hundred meters closer to the Mexico pavilion when I realized I wasn’t going to make it to Frozen and if we didn’t move quickly, I might not make it home. And I had no way of contacting David to let him know that I wasn’t feeling well. Luckily Clark understood. He was super disappointed but I bought him a Gatorade when we found a shady kiosk. Then we ran back through the brilliantly sunny and unshaded International Gateway walkway to Beach Club.

I laid down in the room and tried to recover before David and my second date night with Kid’s Nite Out. We planned to go to the Magic Kingdom to take advantage of the Evening Extra Magic Hours.

Paula arrived right on time and David and I headed out to the Magic Kingdom. As soon as we pulled up in the monorail, we purchased a Lightning Lane for Space Mountain and right after tapping in, David booked a Disability pass for Seven Dwarves Mine Train. Next to Splash, that’s his favourite ride in the park. We headed straight to Tomorrow Land to ride Space then hopped on the People Mover because there was a couple of minutes before we could tap in. I explained to David that the only true proof that you rode the People Mover is if you take a photo of your feet propped up on the opposite bench.



Caption: We’re the worst. This is the wrong end of our bodies for the photo. No one wants to see our faces on this ride; they need to see our shoes.

Then we got on Space Mountain. We went on the Omega track which used to be my favourite when I was younger but was way too intense now.

Afterwards David stopped and got some cold nitro coffee, it was amazing, I only took two sips but got heart palpitations just from those.

We raced across the park to get to Columbia Harbor House before it closed. I had read all kinds of wonderful things about their lobster roll. It tasted like fast food, I was kind of bummed, however I bought fast food so you get what you pay for.

Then we went on Big Thunder Mountain, Clark rode this with Dad the day before. I’ve only ever ridden it with people who are similar in size, namely my sister who is skinny and tiny and my closest friend from when I worked in the parks, who is also skinny and tiny.

Caption: Look at me all smiley and happy, no idea that I’m going to be clinging to the lap bar for dear life in a couple of seconds.

It is the wildest ride in the wilderness if the lap bar is adjusted to someone larger. I thought Star Tours tossed me around until we got to this ride and I was sliding all over the car. I had a fleeting thought as we went over yet another big hill that I hoped my Dad had hung onto Clark the day before as I battled to stay in the railcar.

David and I had such a good time that we rode Thunder Mountain twice that night. The second time in line, there were cockroaches on the floor and the group in front of us were freaking out. We barely waited because it was Evening Extra Magic Hours. I also finally got the chocolate covered frozen banana that I had burned myself trying to find earlier in the day. It was as magnificent as I remembered. That was my go-to snack when I worked at Disney.

We also rode Buzz Lightyear Space Ranger Spin. David beat me naturally. We went on the Haunted Mansion some time in that evening too. We capped off our night with Seven Dwarves Mine Train. It was a super fun time. I’m looking forward to when the kids are older and we can enjoy night time in the parks together.


Caption: My happy place and happy hour.

​

 

[MikeWsGirl]

Well good evening fellow Disney lovers. It snowed today. All of today. None of it really stuck to the ground but all the same, it was snowing on May 20th. Oh well. I hope all of you aren't wearing your winter coats today.

February 5th, 2022 – Secret Sandpits and Rejected Bird Snacks​

This day started out as my least favourite day and became the best day of the trip. I hustled the kids out of the room and let David sleep in for two hours. Clark was being whiny and refused to play by himself so by the time David got up, I was done. David packed the kids off to get breakfast and took them to the pool.

I was stressed about leaving on Sunday and the amount of things I needed to pack. The only time split stays are a good idea is when you have a party of adults. Had my sister Diana and her family come along as planned, it would have been great, as it was, no one was excited about leaving property. Well the kids were. Clark and Claudia wanted to sleep in the Buzz Lightyear bed. But David wasn’t crazy about the driving.

The night before Dad had brought a small Argos camp chair and a bag filled with two giant, rotting coconuts. I wasn’t sure what to do with the coconuts so we decided to do a science experiment. I had two coconuts and two kids. This probably wasn’t kosher with Disney but we walked over to the bridge in between Boardwalk and the International Gateway and dropped them into the water to see if coconuts float. The first one was dense and sank before bobbing to the surface. The second one made a huge splash but stayed in sight. We of course checked that there were no boats first. Also we did not concuss any alligators.

The kids found this hilarious. Claudia especially felt it was memorable, every time we walked past the bridge after that, she’d crane her little head and say, “The boats are floating on our coconuts.” Indeed one of the coconuts hung around for days.

Claudia played with her dolls while Clark wandered around after me talking incessantly. I got annoyed and David packed him off to go mini golfing. Claudia and I went to the pool together; she played on the sand bar and then went in the hottub. Caption: Watch out Tiger Woods, this kindergartener is focused on his game.



Caption: Clark has always loved mini golf. When he was little, he called it "Go!"


Caption: I remembered the courses being very imaginative and well themed. I only went there once during my college program. It was at night otherwise I would have cooked! I was glad that Clark got to experience it. Although I think I did the summerland course, not the one David and Clark did.



Caption: I love how Clark looks like he's about to take flight here. This pose captures his excitement in a way that his face didn't at all. Even before I blurred his expressions they run the gamut from pain to painfully bored.


Caption: They had one of these before each hole. David took photos of more but I found the sculptures around the holes to be more interesting, so I'm mostly posting those.



Caption: Clark's ball decided to swim at one point.



Caption: I don't think he'll make par.



Caption: Second last hole; they saved 'The Boss', as my character attendant used to call him, for last.

 

[MikeWsGirl]

Caption: Clark finally grew out of this shirt two months after we got home. The sleeves were way too short and it was becoming a crop top. I was so sad because it's hard to find Mike Wazowski clothes. He was a dear friend when I worked there so I'm always on the lookout for Monster's Inc wear.


Caption: The sorceror puts a stop to the golfing madness.

At the hot tub in Stormalong Bay, a little girl was making eye contact with Claudia and came really close to us. Her parents warned her, “Riley, not everyone wants to make friends; give them some space.”


A little girl was making eye contact with Claudia and came really close to us. Her parents warned her, “Riley, not everyone wants to make friends; give them some space.”

I laughed really hard because Claudia was making big eyes at the girl saying, “Please come be my friend, I refuse to talk but will pay attention to every word you say.” And said as much to the parents.

Claudia of course didn’t speak to the girl but I kind of facilitated a conversation of sorts. And Claudia was delighted. Claudia probably counts the hot tub girl as one of her BFFs now.

In the hot tub, Claudia begged for a nap. I figured she was just angling for a sucky because she was getting unlimited access to her pacifier this trip so I thought I’d call her bluff. But when I laid her down on the little bed, even though it was only eleven thirty and she’d been up for less than three hours, she went to sleep!

There was a missed connection with Dad so he ended up at the Animal Kingdom well before us. We finally left the resort at one in the afternoon and got into the Animal Kingdom at two.

It was hopping so the earliest Flight of Passage Disability pass time was after four. The kids and I headed straight to the Boneyard so they could play. David had researched where the Starbucks was and went there because neither of us had a coffee that morning.

On our way to the Boneyard, we saw Kevin. I had the kids stop and admire Kevin. When I mistakenly referred to the giant snipe as a ‘he’, the attendant corrected me. I always want my kids to have excellent character interactions so I prompted Clark. “Tell Kevin she’s beautiful.”


Caption: Isn't she lovely? Isn't she wonderful? Isn't she precious? Who doesn't enjoy Kevin? Claudia refused to get out of the stroller. Also I had to edit out the child who was posing nicely with a normal face.

Clark knows that telling pretty ladies they’re beautiful makes them happy and Kevin is a very beautiful bird so Clark repeated it so the character could hear. Kevin preened and purred in response and made eyes at Clark as if to say ‘Thank you, you’re so kind’. Wanting to up the ante and get an even better character interaction, I asked whether the attendant could give our Canadian candies to Kevin.

“We don’t give birds candy,” the attendant snapped.

Well that put me in my place. Animal Kingdom has always had a little dog feel to it when working there, and they really take their stance on conservation seriously.

For the rest of the trip, Clark kept asking to give Kevin birdseed. Thankfully, we didn’t go back to Animal Kingdom. Without the Finding Nemo musical, it’s my least favourite park. I mean I adore Joe Rhode and his oversized earring but Animal Kingdom isn't my thing.

When we got to the Boneyard, I told Clark that he could go wherever he wanted but that I needed to stay with Claudia.

He’s a really good little guy so he checks back in relatively often. Claudia went on the baby slide about five times before Clark returned saying, “Mom! Come see! Come see!” I explained that I had to stay on the ground but that he could take Claudia. Clark grabbed her little hand and led her away, “Claudia! Want to see fossils?”

Caption: Uncovering the mammoth skeleton with another big blue Mom-butt caught in the wild. My favourite part was the kid hoarding the buckets. She had a stack of twenty at one point.

And then I didn’t see the kids. But that was ok. I just watched the bottoms of the slides. They’re my kids so they were dressed in bright colours; I was sure to spot a flash of neon green through the fencing.

And I still didn’t see them. So I moved around but I was calm; Clark’s really good and wouldn’t abandon Claudia anywhere.

Then I still didn’t see them, so I moved back to my initial spot thinking they’d find me better there. I was still calm but you know getting a little antsy.

Then I still didn’t see them and got panicky and debated scaling the play structure to look for them.

I spotted a ramp and followed it to the top where it led to a path over a bridge. I knew there was a play area where kids could dig in the sand but I hadn’t seen it yet. I thought the kids were likely over there. As soon as I crossed the bridge, I saw a giant pit filled with sand, teeming with little children who were all clustered around a skeleton of a mammoth and working frantically to dig it out.

True to form, Clark was sitting right next to Claudia and they were both playing happily in the sand. A cast member was surveying the whole scene, ready to step in if someone started hurling sand.

Caption: Look at how close they're sitting to each other.

I took a seat on a bench nearby and watched Clark and Claudia. It’s funny because they still thought they were alone. I remembered the rare occasions when my sister and I got to venture off somewhere together, the way we stuck closer than normal because our parents weren’t with us. Those sidelong glances of checking around ourselves to make sure we were safe. Even though they’re only six and almost three, Clark and Claudia were both doing that. Both perfectly content in what they were doing, revelling in their independence but slightly on edge, watchful.

Periodically I stood up and went to the bridge. I nearly hadn’t been able to find Clark and Claudia and I knew there was a sand pit. The likelihood of David, Dad and Jen finding a hidden sand pit that they didn’t know existed was zero. I didn’t have a cell phone so the possibility of David and my Dad never finding us again was high. Finally I spotted David and started jumping and shouting like crazy from the bridge. David didn’t see me but Jen did.


Caption: They provided shovels and buckets that had to stay at the dig site. But Clark improvised and took home pockets of souvenir sand.

David brought me coffee and Dad and Jen went on the Dinosaur ride. We had to all but drag the kids by their hair to get them away from the dig site. Claudia had seen Triceratop Spin, a dinosaur riff on Dumbo and wanted to go on. I explained to Clark that he would have to wait in line.

The kids are very good about my weird skin and eyes and understand when I can’t be in the sun or if we have to go home from the park because I’m burning through my clothes but try telling Clark that waiting in line is a part of Disney World. He just doesn’t get it. At least one good thing has come out of my porphyria – the Disability pass is pretty sweet for the family members.

Clark agreed that he wouldn’t whine and would wait patiently. Claudia did well in lines, I tended to use the time to feed her. I swear this trip was an exercise in starving my children while exercising them so any time I remembered to offer food, I did.

The twenty minutes was a gross over estimation and in no time, we were spinning around on dinosaurs. I loved the picture David caught of Claudia; it shows her raw excitement about the ride.

Allright get ready Disboards. I'm going to post a lone photo of Claudia's face because it's too cute to blur out. I expect to be rewarded by a mountain of 'Likes'. Also I love this photo because you can actually see that she is my daughter. I swear my children look nothing like me, they're just their own entities. Before I had children, part of me expected my offspring to look like Russian nesting dolls - like me but smaller. That is not at all the case.


Caption: This is a reference photo so you can see my facial expression replicated on her gorgeous little face. Also please note the little fists clenched in excitement.


Caption: That look of sheer joy is one hundred percent Claudia. She is a wild, fun, little thing. Clark looked like David was sitting on his hand so I didn't feel bad blurring that face. I will post one of him smiling in the next post.

Claudia asked the other day to go on the 'spinning dinosaur ride'. I think of this attraction as a throw away ride, something that could be skipped but clearly it was a riot for her.

 

[Mich123]

Claudia is adorable!

 

[MikeWsGirl]

After this we headed across the park to Flight of Passage, I had thought the height limit was the same as Seven Dwarves but it was higher and Clark didn’t make the cut. I had to run him back to David who was waiting with Claudia. I was not into Flight of Passage, it was like a cartoon Soarin’ on a weird-shaped, vibrating chair. I child-swapped with David who agreed with me after riding.

Afterwards we booked a Disability pass for Navi River Journey and sat in on It’s Tough to be a Bug while we waited.

The giant Hopper animatronic wasn’t working so it was fifty percent less scary. Meh. Not memorable without the petrified children.


Caption: Six pm and actively raining which means I can take my hat off. The weird UV shrug had to stay on though, it isn't after sundown.

We wandered around some trails near the tree of life that I’d never seen, likely because I’d always come during the day and head for the shadiest spots. It was overcast and spitting but it was also late so most of the animals had been put to bed. I saw a three year old on her Dad’s shoulders with a pacifier in her mouth. Whatever gets you through the trip with happy kids. That would be us later on.

After going on the River Journey which was super cool, like ET crossed with the Jungle Cruise, we called an audible and decided to park hop while it was still convenient. We missed the first bus to the Studios but one arrived shortly after.

Clark wouldn’t stop talking about Slinky Dog so David booked a Disability pass as soon as we tapped into the gates. But Clark wanted to ride RIGHT THEN.

Caption: This is Clark’s excited, happy face. He's a serious kid so his happy face is rare in person but it is IMPOSSIBLE to catch on camera. So please enjoy this picture of my son having the time of his life.

We ended up missing a LOT of on ride photos. I think the next time we go, I will ask David to take a photo when we're in line so we can locate the missing photos easier. We rode the Haunted Mansion with the kids, none of those turned up. We rode Slinky Dog so so so many times and none of those came out. And the Pirates photo never turned up either.

We explained to Clark that he’d have to wait forever to get on Slinky Dog right away and that he hated waiting but Clark did not care. So we approached the ride, booked a child swap and David and Clark got into line for Slinky Dog while Claudia and I got in line for Alien Swirling Saucers. Since Slinky Dog was Clark’s favourite ride and we always went on the Saucers while he rode Slinky Dog, I think Claudia rode this ride more than anything else on the trip.

Caption: Gratuitous Slinky Dog photo because it’s Claudia’s favourite ride too after hearing Clark hype it so much. We got this image as a part of the Memory Maker package. I was disappointed that there weren't as many stock images included as when we got the package in 2016.

When Claudia came home, she talked about riding Alien Squirreling Saucers and Mommy said, “Whoa!” because it went fast and how she held one alien hand and Mommy held the other. To make up for not being able to ride Slinky Dog and for all the toys Grandpa Jim bought Clark while they were out, I got Claudia a Toy Story Alien stuffy that day. Claudia wanted to hold onto it but I was worried about flying aliens so we made a compromise that each of us held an alien hand while riding the saucers.

David and Clark appeared shortly after we made our way to the Slinky Dog exit and the two of them sprinted to the bathrooms because Clark had declared halfway through the line that he needed to go. When they came back, I took Clark on Slinky Dog using the Disability pass we booked earlier. After I tapped in, David made another Disability pass. This was how we leveraged rider swap, waiting in line and my pass to get Clark on Slinky Dog six times in a row.

I felt guilty sometimes about using the pass but then David would remind me that no one else was getting ill just from being on vacation and they weren't in pain. I often am over protective of the kids because my first memories of being in the sun include pain. David will try and describe his and in theory their experience, but it's hard for me to wrap my head around. I also think bikinis are madness, loved only my masochists and I can't understand the world's obsession with the beach.

When my family read my trip journal, my Mom and Gran got upset because it was one of the first times I'd talked about my experience with porphyria. Because the sun and the accompanying discomfort are always a part of my life and have always been a part of my life, it didn't take away from the trip. I'd hate for people to read this and think, 'Oh she had a terrible and difficult time' because it wasn't like that at all. There were nights particularly towards the end of the trip when I felt unwell but for the most part, I covered up, and tried to accomodate both my kids and my weird disease at the same time. It helped that David was MVP for the trip; Most Valuable Parent and picked up the slack.

My apologies, that whole section was a little personal, but I love when people share notes, like when @StarWarsMomofGirls! admitted that Gwen cried waking up at unlawful o'clock to ride ROTR or when @MeghanEmily shares her food allergies or about not feeling well in the parks.

While we were waiting for the second Disability pass to come up, we went to Toy Story Mania. This ride is in my top three with Splash Mountain. Tom Bricker calls it an overgrown Wii game but I think it is so much fun. Claudia sat next to me, the cast members tried to make her sit on my lap but I said, “No, then neither of us would get to play properly.”


Caption: Mr Potato Head was not chatty that evening but did agree to a photo.
Also, it isn't obvious because of my weird UV shrug and Claudia's jacket but I am wearing an Ursula themed dress and Claudia is in an Ariel dress. Because I had a ginger baby, so I had to. Her daycare workers always make a fuss whenever she shows up in that outfit. I also had a gold necklace to act as Ariel's voice but again, foiled by my porphyria gear. The necherchief covers it.

Even with the lap bar lowered as far as it could go, Claudia slid around the ride car whenever it spun. At one point I had to reach out and cup her little head to prevent it from smashing into the back of the seat. Claudia loved Toy Story Mania though, she was all focus. She wears the same expression in all of the Buzz Lightyear ride photos.

“Pull the string Claudia!” I cried. On the last round, I helped her aim at the bullseye so she could score lots of points but mostly I focused on my game.

Later that night when she rode with Daddy, he helped Claudia to aim and spent the whole time instructing her how to play at the expense of playing by himself. Clark and I had a riot playing together. I think this was one of Clark’s favourite rides too because he will quote it at home, “I am not your mother- BREAK THOSE PLATES! Sir, yes, sir!”

Sometimes he'll grab tupperware off the drying rack and pretend to be Woody and Buzz in the pre game pretending to dodge pies.

Caption: This was the point in the trip where Claudia started keeping her 3D glasses on.

We spent the whole evening running around Toy Story Land. It’s themed so well – David pointed out the chairs made of Babybels to Clark. There are toys everywhere and all the rides are a blast. Finally the park closed and we made our way to the exit.

For the first time during our trip, we were going to ride the Skyliner as a family. I had wanted the kids first ride to be with us, but it was broken when we went, then Paula from Kid's Nite Out took them for an adventure on it- oh well.


Caption: David always took the kid that was being difficult because I was busy dealing with my skin which meant that it was the Daddy-Claudia show for most of the trip. Here, Claudia is a sneeze away from an overtired volcanic meltdown.

Sitting there in the gondola, it was perfect. The three people I loved best in the world were in one spot, together in my favourite place in the world, all of us were the kind of tired that comes from being really happy. I should mention that Claudia was eating popcorn. Otherwise she might have been cranky. When we got back to the hotel, the kids fell asleep as soon as their heads hit the pillows.

Caption: Please note that you can see Claudia eating popcorn in the reflection. Whatever it took to keep her happy, we did it. No regrets.

Thank you everyone for reading. It's so crazy to me that more people have read this thread than read my blog in three years. I appreciate all of you who are following along and a special thank you to those who post their own reports; they are what tides me over until our next trip.