How old is "too old" for a woman to have a baby?

[yoopermom]

Yes, science is making it more possible to have one at an older and older age, however....

If you're a woman, what's the oldest you will/would have considered having a child?

DH's niece just announced she's pregnant with their ninth child, and she will turn 40 right before it's due. She seems really unhappy that everyone around her isn't jumping with joy, but there is a lot of fear (unspoken).

I'll start, I'm 50, had my tubes tied at 35, which for me was the "right" age. I had my only at 28, which was a pretty good age for me as a balance between physical prime and emotional readiness. Would have loved a few more, but knew I wanted to be "done" by my mid 30s for a variety of reasons.

You?

Terri

 

[DawnM]

A woman is too old when she can no longer have them or doesn't want to have them anymore. I would never presume to make that decision for anyone else.

 

[Christine]

My last child was born when I was 31. For me, personally, I probably would stop at age 35; however, I know several women who have done it much older. No issues.

My MIL had her 4th child at age 42. My cousin had her first child at age 39 and second at age 41. My coworker's cousin had one at age 48 (unplanned). It's not something *I* would ever want to do, but I think having your 9th child at age 40 is fine in my book.

 

[Calee]

My mom had me when she was 39. I'm 36 now I would say I've turned out nicely. I dont know why your family fears for this woman or is anything less than happy for her, based on her age. I wouldn't think one thing about it. Shes 39, not 60.

 

[DisneyMomx7]

Well I was 42 when I had my last. I think every woman probably knows when it's "too late" for her to have another baby. Different for each woman

 

[DisneyHardin]

I'm 39 and still hoping that we might have a baby after years of trying.

 

[Disneylover99]

Yes, science is making it more possible to have one at an older and older age, however....

If you're a woman, what's the oldest you will/would have considered having a child?

DH's niece just announced she's pregnant with their ninth child, and she will turn 40 right before it's due. She seems really unhappy that everyone around her isn't jumping with joy, but there is a lot of fear (unspoken).

I'll start, I'm 50, had my tubes tied at 35, which for me was the "right" age. I had my only at 28, which was a pretty good age for me as a balance between physical prime and emotional readiness. Would have loved a few more, but knew I wanted to be "done" by my mid 30s for a variety of reasons.

You?

Terri

I can see not jumping for joy over a ninth child, but 40 isn't that old these days. What is the fear?

 

[yoopermom]

I'm sorry, probably should have clarified that she had complications with the last one, and lost one either one or two before that, so it's a combination of age and other factors. We are all hoping for another healthy grand niece or nephew!

Terri

 

[Disneylover99]

I'm 39 and still hoping that we might have a baby after years of trying.

Don't give up! I know plenty of women in their 40's who had their first child.
Best of luck!

 

[Kitty 34]

I guess when they hit menopause.

 

[Skippy918]

Maybe it’s not her age. It could be the number of kids she’s had? Although no one should judge her for that either.
My friend just had her first at almost 40, but she married only 2 years ago too. My cousin is nearly 50 and just adopted a baby.

 

[Wubar]

I'm 39 and still hoping that we might have a baby after years of trying.

@DisneyHardin - Best of luck to you! My wife and I, after years of trying to conceive naturally, dealing with numerous unexplained miscarriages, and taking bottles upon bottles and syringes on top of syringes of this, that, and the other fertility drugs, we took a break from all of the fertility treatments and drugs because I said it was doing too much stress to her body and mind. Soon after, she/we got pregnant the natural way, and she gave birth to our healthy son when she was 42 (and we are taking said precious toddler boy to WDW for his first time in January)! Don't lose hope!

 

[Tattylou]

I think it is up to the person - so many factors to consider. I got married at 26 and I had my babies at 30 and 32. I just turned 40 and my kids are 7 and 9. I can't imagine going back to the baby stage. That has nothing to do with my age, I'm just enjoying having kids a bit older right now.
My cousin got married last weekend. She is a year younger than me (39) and she wants a baby asap. We are just in different versions of a timeline even though we are basically the same age.

 

[mom2rtk]

I don't even bat an eye at 40. Seriously, that bothers someone?

It's a very private decision. That's between the woman, her partner, her doctor and her God (if she believes).

I'm guessing the ones who would balk at 40 didn't have trouble conceiving at an earlier age themselves.

I'm 39 and still hoping that we might have a baby after years of trying.

Best of luck to you! We fought that battle ourselves. I hope it works out for you!

 

[wenrob]

Yes, science is making it more possible to have one at an older and older age, however....

If you're a woman, what's the oldest you will/would have considered having a child?

DH's niece just announced she's pregnant with their ninth child, and she will turn 40 right before it's due. She seems really unhappy that everyone around her isn't jumping with joy, but there is a lot of fear (unspoken).

I'll start, I'm 50, had my tubes tied at 35, which for me was the "right" age. I had my only at 28, which was a pretty good age for me as a balance between physical prime and emotional readiness. Would have loved a few more, but knew I wanted to be "done" by my mid 30s for a variety of reasons.

You?

Terri

I had my first at 28 and my 2nd/3rd at 37. Not gonna lie it’s been harder the second time around but I think that has more to do with getting the 2 for 1 deal than anything else. Their toddler years about did me in. The thing that bothers me most is as time goes on people assume I’m their grandmother. (Don’t ever do that btw it’s horribly rude!) At the same time I’m way less uptight about things to older DD’s dismay. Wouldn’t change it for the world.

My personal cut off was 40 but I have no issues with what other women do. It’s none of my business. My dad and his brothers have uncles their ages so great grandma was having babies well into her 40’s. I think my grandma would have to if she’d been able to.

I feel bad for your niece. A friend and his wife hid her 6th pregnancy (his 8th child) because people judged them for the amount of kids they have. As long as they’re well taken care of and happy people need to mind their own business. If your niece is on her ninth pregnancy I would have to assume her doctor has her medical history and has things well in hand. Having babies in your 40’s is not the risk it used to be.

 

[PrincessShmoo]

Yes, science is making it more possible to have one at an older and older age, however....

If you're a woman, what's the oldest you will/would have considered having a child?

DH's niece just announced she's pregnant with their ninth child, and she will turn 40 right before it's due. She seems really unhappy that everyone around her isn't jumping with joy, but there is a lot of fear (unspoken).

I'll start, I'm 50, had my tubes tied at 35, which for me was the "right" age. I had my only at 28, which was a pretty good age for me as a balance between physical prime and emotional readiness. Would have loved a few more, but knew I wanted to be "done" by my mid 30s for a variety of reasons.

You?

Terri

Well, I had my last at 44. Yes, naturally. No help. We married late and there was no choice about having kids younger.

I'm pretty much in the camp of - when her body stops doing it naturally.

 

[NYCgrrl]

2 made sense for my life. Knew I could afford to give them the kind of life I felt was appropriate sooooo when I had them it was "shut down" time with my age making little difference.Was thankfully for a different branch of science on that level.
To each their own.

 

[apirateslifeforme]

My personal cutoff was 42, as I don't want to deal with high school nonsense in my sixties. After many years of infertility and reproductive assistance, I finally got pregnant at 40 and our son was born a month after I turned 41. I know our clinic generally cuts off at age 43, but if the woman in question is in exceptional health, they'll continue until she's 45. However, I'm in numerous groups on FB and I've found that a lot of doctors and clinics will go up to 50. I have a friend who just had her second child at 46 1/2. And there's one woman who had her first child at age 52.

For me, personally, I'm thrilled to be the age I am with a young 'un. I know now that I was nowhere near ready to be a mother until I was at least 35.

 

[quandrea]

@DisneyHardin - Best of luck to you! My wife and I, after years of trying to conceive naturally, dealing with numerous unexplained miscarriages, and taking bottles upon bottles and syringes on top of syringes of this, that, and the other fertility drugs, we took a break from all of the fertility treatments and drugs because I said it was doing too much stress to her body and mind. Soon after, she/we got pregnant the natural way, and she gave birth to our healthy son when she was 42 (and we are taking said precious toddler boy to WDW for his first time in January)! Don't lose hope!

I second this. After nearly six years of infertility, two failed ivfs and the loss of sixteen babies due to miscarriage, I conceived twins naturally. I was thirty six when they were born. I don't think forty is too old. I agree with the first reply that it's an entirely personal decision. If a woman's body can conceive and carry the child, why not? I'm forty five now and if by some miracle, I got pregnant again, I'd be thrilled. Not going to happen though. After the twins, we had three kids and the trauma of all the miscarriages was still very real. No desire to walk that road again.

 

[mjkacmom]

I had my first at 29, my fourth/fifth at 34. I found out on ancestry.com that my great grandmother has her eighth baby at 46 (irish Catholic).